Tales From The Crypt “Television Terror”

Morton Downey Jr?  Now that’s a name I’ve not heard in a long time.  A long time.

For really good reason.

Morton plays Norton…Rivers.  He’s a talk show host.  One of those obnoxious kinds   Man, how did Downey pull off that character’s whole vibe and personality?

Look, the episode is fun and all, but the casting here is the most noteworthy thing about it.  Downey has a face made for radio compared to other actors on the show, and he’s not a bad actor or anything, but really, the attraction here is a talk show host known for being sketchy and having questionable guests on his show basically playing a talk show host known for being sketchy and having questionable guests.

Then again, I would hope the real Downey wasn’t as hated by his behind-the-scenes people as Mr. Norton Rivers.

Regardless, Horton heard of a who in the form of a haunted house where the psychic he hired says it would be a really bad idea to go into the house where an old lady ran a boarding house where she killed her elderly male residents and stole their Social Security checks.  It’s just Norton and his faithful cameraman Trip.

Trip does not deserve what happens to him.

See, of course the place is haunted.  The dead residents are hanging around there, asking for help, moving things, breaking things, and walking around with their throats cut and other signs of what killed them.  In a reverse The Shining there’s even a naked old man in the bathtub.  Trip, he dies early, hung by unseen forces–he does not deserve that–while Norton gets to run around because someone else is holding the camera when it was really just him and Trip in there, and by the time the old lady with the chainsaw comes out, man, things don’t look good for Norton.

Except, of course, the ratings are through the roof and the network wants more.  Did they want Norton to be mailed by a chainsaw, tossed out an upper-story window, and hanging by the neck from a cord?  Well, maybe.  Nobody seems to like the guy that much…

What about the Cryptkeeper?  He’s watching a little TV, his feet up on his…counter? What is that surface?

Notable Names:  Pretty much just Downey.