February 27, 2024

Gabbing Geek

Your online community for all things geeky.

Weekend Trek “Bloodlines”

Picard learns he may have a son from an old foe.

Wow.  For the final season, Star Trek the Next Generation decided to bring back a very forgettable foe from the generally terrible first season.

Jimmy and Tom weigh in on the episode.

“Bloodlines”

Bok returns, threatening the life of a son Picard never knew he had.

jimmy:  Ok episode. Though you could see the genetic code re-sequencing twist coming a mile away.

tomk:  I’m sure if Crusher ever needs to trick Picard with a paternity test, she’ll do a better job of it.

jimmy:  There were a lot of Picard Season Three parallels here.

tomk:  Like when Junior turned out to have Borg powers?

jimmy:  Parallels, not identical.

tomk:  Oh.

Did he have Ferengi powers in this one instead?

jimmy:  He did like to acquire wealth.

tomk:  Maybe his hearing is also extra sharp.

jimmy:  And he looked like known Ferengi, Jim Carrey.

tomk:  Too bad he didn’t look like known mutant Hugh Jackman.

jimmy:  Not many do.

tomk:  He doesn’t even look like known nonunion Scottish equivalent Gerard Butler.

jimmy:  He mostly looked like some guy you never see again.

tomk:  Like Ryan’s mysterious fraternal twin Eugene?

jimmy:  We didn’t see him in the first place.

tomk:  He’s awfully mysterious.

jimmy:  As mysterious as a Ferengi appearing at the foot of your bed?

tomk:  No, that’s when you file a restraining order.

jimmy:  Someone better tell Picard.

tomk:  He did. That’s why he called Worf.

jimmy:  Maybe he should have called someone to not allow intruders to beam onto the ship at will.

tomk:  He talked to Data and Geordi about that.

jimmy:  Then all bases are covered.

tomk:  And then he talked to Beverly about being a parent.

jimmy:  Whose son just left to become an interdimensional being.

tomk:  The Reverse Angle guys actually wondered why Picard didn’t go to Worf since Worf’s parenting experience was closer to Picard’s in that both had a son they didn’t know about.

jimmy:  Good point.  He probably figured Worf would hit him with an endless barrage of rock puns.

tomk:  Worf is known far and wide for his sense of humor.

jimmy:  Exactly.

tomk:  Picard probably trusts Crusher more for the personal stuff.

jimmy:  That’s true.  It is a good point about Worf though.

tomk:  I would think Picard might not want to show informality or discomfort in front of most members of the crew.

jimmy:  That’s usually reserved for people hitting on Troi.

tomk:  You’re right. Worf would never show interest in Troi.

jimmy:  I don’t remember what happens the rest of the season, but I felt like they had an actual relationship.  But outside of one supposed dinner, they’ve only hooked up in alternate realities.

tomk:  You’ll have to check TNG After Hours on your blu-rays.

jimmy:  Apparently so.

tomk:  And after that, you can make sure you don’t have a long lost son.

jimmy:  I think I’d know by now.

tomk:  Then who’s that kid standing behind you?

jimmy:  I dunno. He brings the donuts.

tomk:  His name tag says “Jimmy Junior.”

jimmy:  That’s just a coincidence.

tomk:  You sure it isn’t a trap set up by your lamest forgotten enemy?

jimmy:  So lame I forgot what he looked like.

tomk:  He looks like this:

jimmy:  Dammit. Like being Rickrolled.

tomk:  He is lame. Not very forgettable, but lame.

jimmy:  Regardless, I had little recollection of Bok from season one.  I’m surprised Picard did.  I guess because it was in the script.

tomk:  It wasn’t even the same actor.

jimmy:  No one noticed.

tomk:  Is that like how no one knows who David S. Pumpkins really is?

jimmy:  That is one of life’s great mysteries.

tomk:  But the episode does seem to hit a family theme the final season is going with. We got stuff with Worf’s brother and son, Troi’s mother and sister, Data’s mother, Geordi’s mother, Jenny’s cousin, Batman’s roommate, Luke Skywalker’s father, and the Moose’s elk uncle. Plus the return of Wesley and this guy who is not a Picard.

jimmy:  One might say, too many family episodes?

tomk:  It works for Vin Diesel.

jimmy:  Well, it did.

tomk:  Do I need to get Ryan in here to talk to you?

jimmy:  Please don’t.

tomk:  I won’t, but I can’t speak for anyone else.

jimmy:  So how do you re-sequence someone’s DNA without 1) altering their appearance and b) them not noticing?

tomk:  What?  You don’t know?

jimmy:  Do you?

tomk:  Sure.

jimmy:  Care to share?

tomk:  Not where Watson might see.

jimmy:  Ok. Tell me later at the malt shop.

tomk:  Will do.

jimmy:  The Reverse Angle guys make a funny point about the Ferengi basically being idiots…except that sun shield guy…and apparently Bok can re-sequence DNA…though not very well.

tomk:  Well, that is the sort of thing an idiot would do.

jimmy:  Fair point.

tomk:  A smart person would have done a good job.

jimmy:  Or, you know, not done it at all.

tomk:  But how else can you trick Picard into believing some rando jerk is his son? 

jimmy:  Maybe come up with a completely different plan?

tomk:  That was the best plan he could come up with.

jimmy:  Idiot.

tomk:  Clearly. And this episode came along after DS9 started to make the Ferengi deep.

jimmy:  RA made that point too.

tomk:  Did they also point out how wise it is to partner with a Canadian?

jimmy:  That’s just common sense.

tomk:  Yes, but if they didn’t say it, that’s one I have on them.

jimmy:  Great job, Tom!  Have this non-alcoholic beer that looks and tastes like Diet Coke.

tomk:  

I am not sure who ever thought up such a beverage.

jimmy:  A Ferengi probably.

tomk:  Figures. Well, this episode was forgettable. Ready to move on to another forgettable episode?

jimmy:  Not really going out with a bang here season seven.

tomk:  Maybe they saved all the good stuff for the finale.

jimmy:  Maybe. How many are left before that?

tomk:  Two.

jimmy:  Wow. We’ve come a long way.

tomk:  Yes, we have. Have a breakfast burrito.

jimmy:  Thanks!

tomk:  You deserve it after slogging through bad Ferengi episodes.

jimmy:  If that’s the criteria, here’s one for you.

tomk:  Why thank you.

jimmy:  Shall we enjoy our breakfast and watch the next episode?

tomk:  What?  You have already forgotten Faux Picard Junior?

jimmy:  Who?

tomk:  Sounds about right.

Next:  “Emergence”