Hey, look, back to more Avatar: The Last Airbender talk with Jimmy and Tom!
They got two more down with the episodes “Bato of the Water Tribe” and “The Deserter” this time.
“Bato of the Water Tribe”
Aang worries he will be abandoned when Sokka and Katara encounter an old friend of their father’s.
jimmy: Sokka is a good tracker as well. He really is underrated.
tomk: It’s almost like he isn’t the idiot he appears to be when we first met him.
tomk: He did figure out the perfume trick.
jimmy: He’s good like that too.
tomk: And he’s not an HR report waiting to happen like Iroh.
jimmy: He was just trying to relax on his boat and have a cup of tea.
tomk: And let a paralyzed woman half his age lie on top of him.
tomk: A quarter?
tomk: Just less than Iroh?
jimmy: She didn’t seem very old.
tomk: She at least seemed to be an adult.
tomk: She was living on her own and hanging out in bars.
jimmy: Teenagers don’t do that?
tomk: Lumberjacks do.
jimmy: She didn’t look like a lumberjack.
tomk: She looked like a bounty hunter. She’s the Mandalorian!
jimmy: And we know at least one of the guys who works on this show knows a thing or two about that.
jimmy: That…dragon…was something to deal with.
tomk: Appa bodyslammed it pretty good.
jimmy: True. He held his own for awhile.
tomk: An animal his size would need a lot of toxin to knock out. And Appa has never reacted violently before. Lousy mole monster made him mad.
jimmy: Protecting his pack.
tomk: Aunt Wu probably saw that coming.
jimmy: She could have warned them.
tomk: Warned who? The Aang Gang or the Zuko mob?
jimmy: Aang. She never met the others.
tomk: So that wasn’t Aunt Wu flirting with Iroh when Zuko’s new friend tracked the Aang Gang to that village?
jimmy: If you want to count that. But I doubt she was going to help them out. But could have easily mentioned it to the Aang Gang when they left last episode.
tomk: That would require her to actually be able to see into the future
jimmy: Isn’t she a fortune teller?
tomk: Do you believe in fortunetellers?
jimmy: No. And this certainly doesn’t help her case.
tomk: Since the Aang Gang prevailed, maybe she didn’t need to warn them.
jimmy: There’s that tricky fortune teller logic again. “If I told them what would happen, it wouldn’t happen.”
tomk: It worked for Dr. Strange.
jimmy: Though every movie/show since seems to find a different way Thanos could have been defeated.
tomk: Like if someone just asked him nicely not to do it?
jimmy: I think Black Panther did that.
tomk: Or, just call everybody and wait until the Justice League, Spider-Man, and a monkey stop him.
jimmy: And that’s why they’ll never top Endgame.
tomk: Not enough Shrek.
jimmy: Or they could have just used the lizard thing from this show.
tomk: The one that was part mole?
tomk: They could have even sent in you with the Moose and a fire truck.
jimmy: Hey, we get results.
tomk: Maybe you should take that to the Fire Nation and fight some fires.
jimmy: Maybe I will!
tomk: That seems much more effective than a giant robot that runs on cabbage.
You don’t have a cabbage-fueled robot.
jimmy: I don’t?
tomk: It’s on back-order.
jimmy: Any day now then.
tomk: It’s coming with the Tesla cyber truck.
jimmy: Ugh. Gross.
tomk: Yeah, something else that was promised a long time ago and probably doesn’t exist.
jimmy: They could never perfect the cabbage mixture. Or the bullet proof windows.
tomk: It’s a good thing that the Fire Nation has no guns.
jimmy: Or anyone?
tomk: Well, my country has a lot of them.
jimmy: Your country is not in this cartoon.
tomk: Sure it is. Way in the back there.
jimmy: Ah, I missed it.
tomk: It’s next to the Enchanted Land of Canada, home to the Wise Ones, Blessed Benders of Beer and Ketchup Chips.
jimmy: A wonderful place to live.
tomk: So wonderful, it never appears on the show because no TV show could possibly capture its true glory.
jimmy: I understand that. So why isn’t the US shown?
tomk: Too violent over there.
All those guns…
tomk: You don’t wanna know where Bato of the Water Tribe went after he left the episode.
jimmy: Not the Water Nation?
tomk: Naw. He went off to America for some of those sweet, sweet firearms.
jimmy: That’s gonna be a hell of a twist in Book Two.
tomk: Not if he gets to Canada first and decides to stay there.
jimmy: That would be tempting.
tomk: Bato seemed like a wise man. I’m sure he made the right decision.
jimmy: Wiser than Aang. Or was that Jack Tripper?
tomk: Aang isn’t that wise. He can’t even hide a suppressed message for very long.
jimmy: I suppose being 12 is his excuse.
tomk: What’s your excuse?
jimmy: I act like I’m 12?
jimmy: That said, Katara and Sokka were pretty quick to ditch Aang.
tomk: Not without good reason and they weren’t gone long.
jimmy: Yes, Aang made a mistake but…one, he’s a child. And two, he’s the freaking Avatar!
tomk: So,it’s OK if the Avatar makes a mistake?
jimmy: Everyone makes mistakes.
tomk: Yes, but most of us don’t get to claim to be the Avatar to get out of it.
I mean, I suppose Jake Sully can, but that’s totally different situation.
jimmy: He’s not a bender.
tomk: But he is an Avatar.
jimmy: He’s the blue sheep of the family.
tomk: There’s probably an ointment for that.
jimmy: Or a frozen amphibian.
tomk: Look, if you are asking me to get for you a frozen amphibian…
jimmy: I don’t need one. I’m not blue.
tomk: Are you sure? Some people aren’t.
jimmy: Best. Batman. Ever.
tomk: He better go help Aang then. The Fire Lord sounds a lot like the Joker.
jimmy: I smell crossover!
tomk: Keep smelling.
jimmy: Too bad.
tomk: You get a Bato, not a Batman.
jimmy: Na na na na na na na na Bato!
tomk: There will also be no appearances by Adam West.
jimmy: This show is really anti-Batman.
tomk: I think it’s not so much anti-Batman as pro-Aang.
jimmy: He is the avatar.
tomk: He’s got his own t-shirts.
jimmy: That’s cool.
tomk: You should get one.
It’ll go well with this one:
jimmy: That is awesome as well.
tomk: You’re easily impressed.
jimmy: Or am I?
tomk: Did you see that blue car?
jimmy: No! Where?!?
tomk: You sound impressed.
tomk: Well, then you can finally take your rite of adulthood. You just need to navigate this boat between some rocks with the Moose, Beaver, Cousin Minka, and Captain Jake as your crew.
jimmy: Sounds doable.
tomk: Also, none of those people know nautical terms except Captain Jake, but he’s drunk.
jimmy: Maybe Sokka can help.
tomk: He already passed his test.
jimmy: So he’s a good one to help!
tomk: No, it means he’s not allowed to help. I didn’t see Bato help Sokka.
jimmy: Did he ask?
tomk: Bato said so.
It was a test of Sokka’s manhood.
tomk: I’m sure you can pass the test. The alternative is to drive to the store to buy snacks while the Moose, the Beaver, Cousin Minka, and Captain Jake all bicker over who rides shotgun.
jimmy: Sounds safer.
tomk: Jake is still drunk and might try to drive if you don’t watch him.
jimmy: Maybe I should leave the driving to the Water Tribe.
tomk: That’s probably a good idea. We’ll find a way to test your maturity later. Besides, if that’s a lost member of the Water Tribe, maybe an outcast from another nation is worth looking into.
jimmy: The hot cocoa and marshmallow tribe?
tomk: Um, no.
jimmy: Oh. Too bad. That tribe sounds delicious.
tomk: I was thinking…maybe Fire Nation.
jimmy: Those guys aren’t as delicious.
tomk: No, but they make things delicious.
jimmy: That is true.
tomk: Besides, the entire country can’t all be jerks.
jimmy: Also true. We’ve seen that already.
tomk: Maybe this one can teach Aang some firebending.
jimmy: Oh, he needs that.
tomk: He does, but he needs to learn water and earth first.
jimmy: Geez Aang, come on already. Not like there is a time crunch or anything.
tomk: Well, there may be a good reason to go in that order.
jimmy: Fire being the enemy.
tomk: Well, there may be other reasons.
jimmy: Fire bad?
tomk: You know it.
jimmy: Brownies good.
tomk: Well, just be careful how you serve them.
jimmy: Homer might be a bad choice to lead us against the Fire Nation.
tomk: Then someone better teach Aang more stuff.
tomk: You think Bart can bend?
jimmy: Do rules count?
jimmy: There you go.
tomk: Fortunately, your inquiries did get you a free t-shirt.
jimmy: I’ll take it!
tomk: However, maybe Aang can learn a little firebending now.
jimmy: Let’s do it.
tomk: You got it!
Aang tries to learn some firebending from a bending master who deserted the Fire Nation’s army.
jimmy: The one where we learn the healing powers of…water.
tomk: You got a problem with manipulating a substance that makes up 70% of the human body to promote healing?
jimmy: No. It’s just not usually something that heals you on it’s own.
tomk: Well, practice your bending and you too can do other things.
jimmy: Just don’t ask that fire bender to help you.
tomk: He had good reason to be wary.
jimmy: You might put your eye out.
tomk; But think of all the neat firebending tricks you could learn.
jimmy: That’s gonna leave a mark.
tomk: Keep Katara on standby.
jimmy: That skill will certainly come in handy. Uh, no pun intended.
tomk: Of course not.
But you’re learning. You have seen a firemaster who wishes he could bend water.
jimmy: Anything but fire.
tomk: But think what you can do with fire.
tomk: I mean, that’s much better than what you can do with water.
jimmy: Do you know that from experience, Tom?
tomk: Yeah. Lousy Greg…
jimmy: He gets everyone eventually.
tomk: But not Jeong Jeong.
jimmy: Oh no. Not him.
tomk: Not if you value your eyebrows.
jimmy: I do.
tomk: And I hope you learned a valuable lesson just watching that guy at work.
jimmy: I did.
tomk: Good. Now go do your breathing exercises.
jimmy: I don’t know if I can hold that stance.
tomk: Sure you can. And don’t drop that bowling ball.
jimmy: This is hard work.
tomk: You need discipline for this, Jimmy.
jimmy: Like the Amish?
tomk: Yeah, but that’s for the barn raising later.
jimmy: Then we’ll raise another.
tomk: Well, we only need one for Watson’s…stuff.
jimmy: The less said about that the better.
tomk: Exactly. But at least we got an answer as to why Aang needs to learn water and earth before fire.
jimmy: So he doesn’t burn the world down?
tomk: Some people do just want to watch the world burn.
jimmy: Zhao maybe.
tomk: He does seem to burn his own stuff.
jimmy: Smart maneuvering by Aang.
tomk: Aang did learn something.
jimmy: And that he’s not ready for fire bending.
tomk: And Sokka and Katara both have better discipline than he does.
jimmy: He is 12.
tomk: What’s Zhao’s excuse?
tomk: That excuse works far too often.
jimmy: It is what it is.
tomk: Is Jeong Jeong also a jerk?
jimmy: Good question. Maybe not the most social guy, but probably not a jerk.
tomk: He was very nice to Katara.
jimmy: He just knew that Aang wasn’t ready.
tomk: He must be a smart man with no patience for fools.
jimmy: And he pities them.
tomk: That’s a different bending master.
jimmy: He bends gold.
tomk: Better than us. What do you bend? Your elbow to drink a beer?
jimmy: It happens.
tomk: I tend to bend the wrong way if I don’t stretch before strenuous activity.
jimmy: Like lifting the ice cream cooler from the cafeteria to your office?
tomk: That actually easy. I give the ice cream away first. By the by, have a pint of French vanilla.
jimmy: Have any French chocolate?
tomk: Jenny took it.
tomk: Then she raided your donut stash.
jimmy: I need to hire some benders for protection.
jimmy: That’ll work for my donut stash. My beer stash, not so much.
tomk: What about your money stash?
jimmy: How do you think I got the donut and beer stash?
tomk: People just give you stuff.
jimmy: Sure, Tom. Someone just goes around giving out free donuts and beer.
tomk: Here’s a cheeseburger, Jimmy.
tomk: And here’s Jeong Jeong’s address so you can learn some firebending.
jimmy: I don’t think I’m ready for that.
tomk: In that case, have a ticket to AvatarWorld. It’s like Disneyworld, but it’s for Avatar.
jimmy: Hopefully I don’t get picked to get up on stage while I’m trying to remain incognito.
tomk: You know a firebending trick when you see one.
jimmy: Only the one I’ve seen Watson preform.
tomk: This one?
jimmy: That’s it, but less spinning.
tomk: Especially on ghost pepper chili night.
jimmy: That night starts off so good…
tomk: And that’s usually when someone replenishes the donuts and beer.
jimmy: And no one gets their hands burned.
tomk: No. Not their hands.
jimmy: No. Not their hands.
tomk: Well, Jimmy, I think it is safe to say you understand firebending better than Zhao if nothing else.
jimmy: I just understand it’s dangerous.
tomk: Smart man. Have a bowl of ghost pepper chili.
jimmy: I’m gonna regret this tomorrow.
tomk: Why? It’s for Watson before he leaves for his flight to Australia.
jimmy: Then bring it on!
tomk: Your bigger bowl is this one. Jeong Jeong insisted.
jimmy: He’s so thoughtful when he’s not yelling at Aang to go away.
tomk: He wants you to go away too.
jimmy: What did I do?
tomk: You brought the Moose and the Beaver, and they robbed his donut stash.
jimmy: Ugh. Those two. Can’t take them anywhere.
tomk: Also, he likes his solitude.
jimmy: Can’t blame him there.
tomk: Too many idiots keep asking him for lessons or cleaning out his donut stash.
jimmy: That’s what sets me off as well.
tomk: What lessons do you give?
jimmy: I am skilled in a wide array of subjects.
tomk: Such as?
jimmy: Long bow hunting. Staying inside the lines when coloring. Hating cabbage. Just the usual stuff.
tomk: What about Spider-Man lore?
jimmy: That’s in the advanced class.
tomk: And how about inventing cool stuff?
jimmy: I’m still working on that.
tomk: Well, the next episode might show some of that sort of thing.
jimmy: Inventing cool stuff?
jimmy: Cooler than a dragon made of fire?
tomk: Well, maybe not that cool.
jimmy: That was pretty cool.
tomk: It’s not as cool as coloring between the lines.
It’s actually much cooler.
jimmy: Is it as cool as a flying bison whistle to get you out of a tight scrape?
tomk: That’s a close one. Are we still talking about that dragon?
jimmy: But that was only a dragon that could breath fire. This dragon was made of fire!
tomk: I don’t see the dragon in that meme. It could be one made of fire and it brought a comely young woman with him.
jimmy: We know the truth.
tomk: That season eight never happened in Canada?
jimmy: Yup. Still waiting.
tomk: Would you like to stop waiting and see the next episode of The Last Airbender?
tomk: Good. Let’s check out the Northern Air Temple.
NEXT TIME: Tom and Jimmy will return soon with more Last Airbender talk. Be back soon for their thoughts on “The Northern Air Temple” and “The Waterbending Master.”