Going Through Avatar: The Last Airbender Part Seven

Hey, Happy Halloween!  Here’s another transcript of Jimmy and Tom’s thoughts on a pair of Last Airbender episodes,

Hey, there is someone in a disguise in the first one they covered here.

“The Blue Spirit”

A mysterious figure offers Aang help when he’s found by Zhao’s forces.

jimmy:    And also he’s a ninja 

tomk:  Is he this universe’s Batman?

jimmy:  He might be.

tomk:  Well, you do like Batman. And the Blue Spirit got a lot done without tossing a single fireball.

jimmy:  Did he?  I kinda thought he might have when he took off the first guard off camera in the hallway. There was a burst of flame that seemed to come in the opposite direction of how the guard would have been standing. But maybe I’m reading too much into it.

tomk:  That could have been the guard too. We didn’t see.

jimmy:  Yes, possibly. And that was probably the intent.

tomk:  That makes it more surprising when Zuko is unmasked. Even if he only saved Aang so he can capture the Avatar himself.

jimmy:  Yeah. And I only really thought it might have been him using the fire bending after the reveal. Likely was the guard.

tomk:  He really fooled you, Jimmy.

jimmy:  He did. And even after you planted the clue last chat.

tomk:  No wonder Aang offered to be his friend.

jimmy:  Which was not gracefully accepted.

tomk:  Zuko has some issues he needs to work through. At least, that’s probably what Iroh thinks.

jimmy:  He just needs to be the one who brings in the avatar. And he had no love for Zhao.

tomk:  Zhao seems like he’d fail the Jerk Test.

jimmy:  Fail?  Or get an A+?

tomk:  I dunno. It’s your test.

jimmy:  He’s a jerk either way.

tomk:  Even other Fire Nation people seem to think so.

jimmy:  That archer guy did…until Zhao got promoted.

tomk:  People hate jerks.

jimmy:  Most people. But sometimes not other jerks.

tomk:  Do you think Zhao is the type of jerk to be liked by other, lesser jerks?

jimmy:  I bet daddy fire bender likes him.

tomk:  Ozai might be the biggest jerk of them all.

jimmy:  There you go.

tomk:  I’m starting to think this world needs more heroes and less jerks.

jimmy:  There probably used to be until the Fire Nation decided to take over.

tomk:  Every place has heroes. Look at Canada. Wolverine.  Deadpool. Alpha Flight. Jim Carrey. Alex Trebek. The Polkaroo.

And of course…

jimmy:  The greatest of them all.

And I’m surprised you knew about the Polkaroo.

tomk:  You told me about him.

jimmy:  I knew it!

tomk:  I’m a bit jealous. I come from New Jersey.  Do you know who we got as our hero?

jimmy:  Everyone digs giant robots.

tomk:  Well, yes.  But he’s Jersey’s only hero.

jimmy:  You’re probably not attacking Jersey with Manhattan right next door.

tomk:  New York heroes don’t come to defend Jersey.

They think they’re too good for the place.

jimmy:  We’ll get Aang to talk to them.

tomk:  He has to save his own world first.

jimmy:  He can’t even save himself.

tomk:  He did save the Blue Spirit.

jimmy:  After the Blue Spirit saved him.  Mostly.

tomk:  It was a team effort!

jimmy:  Don’t tell Zuko!

tomk:  He might figure that out given time.

jimmy:  See…those guys could be best buds!

tomk:  Aang certainly thinks so. Besides, his other friends are delirious with fever and loaded down with stolen goods.

jimmy:  Oh Momo.

tomk:  Sokka may not have been the most delirious person there if Katara thought Momo could fetch anything.

jimmy:  He does seem genuinely smart.  Usually.

tomk:  Well, they’re always broke.  Some of that stuff might buy a lot of provisions.

jimmy:  Though it seemed to disappear in the final shot when Aang got back.

tomk:  Momo knows Aang would never let him keep that stuff,

jimmy:  Maybe Momo is related to Baby Groot.

tomk:  You mean the show didn’t show us how Momo came back with some dude’s nose or something?

jimmy:  Not specifically.

tomk:  Good.  That’s awfully dark for this show.

jimmy:  This show can be pretty dark at times. Even if only implied.

tomk:  True. Maybe it would lighten up if Momo stole a giant robot for Aang.

jimmy:  That would be awesome.

tomk:  I have it on good authority that you dig giant robots.

jimmy:  Who doesn’t?

tomk:  Probably not Zhao if one steps on him.

jimmy:  Hopefully one does.

tomk:  This show seems to have a distinct lack of giant robots.

jimmy:  It’s only season one.

tomk:  Yeah, sure. The Cabbage Man is probably building one.

jimmy:  Out of cabbage?

tomk:  Well, maybe fueled by cabbage.

jimmy:  Now you’re getting it!

tomk:  Getting what?  That you hate cabbage with the fire of a thousand suns?

jimmy:  Yes. And that fire can fuel the Cabbatron.

tomk:  So, you want cabbage now?

jimmy:  Only to fuel my Fire Nation destroying robot.

tomk:  Is Jet your co-pilot?

jimmy:  No no. My giant robot has a no jerks policy.

tomk:  You said your robot would destroy an entire nation.

jimmy:  Not literally. Geez, Tom.

tomk:  Well, good.  You don’t want to be declared a jerk by your own test.

jimmy:  That’s true. I’m just trying to return balance to the nations.

tomk:  You want Aang’s job now?

jimmy:  Only to help.

tomk:  Well, I am sure giant robots can only be used for good.

jimmy:  Was Stay Puft Marshmallow Man a robot?

tomk:  You wanna ask him?

jimmy:  Well, no.

tomk:  Not without some kind of sugarbender by your side.

jimmy:  Mmmm. Sugar bender.

tomk:  We got one of those in the Gabbing Geek cafeteria.

jimmy:  It’s the best.

tomk:  Certainty better than sucking on frozen amphibians.

jimmy:  Yeah, that was kinda gross.

tomk:  Don’t ask the crazy woman for cures…even if they work.

jimmy:  Once she said she was crazy, I was surprised he still went the frozen frog route.

tomk:  He didn’t have any other options.

jimmy:  Could have tried giving them the cat food.

tomk:  But that lacks the medicinal properties of frozen frogs.

jimmy:  According to a crazy person.

tomk:  They got well pretty quick from the looks of things.

jimmy:  Indeed. Maybe their sickness was all a hoax.

tomk:  You don’t think being stuck in a storm won’t get you a bad fever?  That fisherman might be dead for all you know.

jimmy:  He probably had a freezer full of them frogs.

tomk:  Does he have a freezer?  Should I ask what’s in yours?

jimmy:  A cooler then?

tomk:  Sure, Jimmy.

jimmy:  How else do the keep their frogs frozen?

tomk:  Very cold swamps?

jimmy:  There you go getting all technically right again.

tomk:  I listened to the crazy herbalist woman. Especially since she works with the sugarbender in the cafeteria and I want to make sure I get the right meal.

jimmy:  Smart.

tomk:  But that’s neither here nor there. Lots of characters on this show listen to older women.

jimmy:  As they should.

tomk:  So, should we see what woman they should listen to next?

jimmy:  That sounds like a segue!

tomk:  It could be unless you have more to say about Aang and Zuko’s Excellent Adventure.

jimmy:  It wasn’t bogus.

tomk:  In that case, how do you feel about fortunetellers?

jimmy:  They’re bogus?

tomk:  Well, one member of the Aang Gang agrees with you.  Ready to find out who?

jimmy:  Ready.

tomk:  Good. Time to read some tea leaves.

“The Fortuneteller”

The Aang Gang visits a village where people rely a little too much on the local fortuneteller.

jimmy:  So I tried for two days and no way would Netflix play this episode on my iPad.  I finally got to watch it by using my phone.  Ugh.  Could the fortuneteller have seen that coming?

tomk:  Aunt Wu sees all, Jimmy. She knew Secret Invasion was going to be bad.

jimmy:  She could have warned us!

tomk:  Would you have listened?

jimmy:  Probably not.

tomk:  Then stop complaining when she’s right.

jimmy:  Only if Sokka will.

tomk:  But Sokka understands science.

jimmy:  So do I!

tomk:  You understand science?

jimmy:  You don’t?

tomk:  I’m not something of a scientist, Jimmy.

jimmy:  Huh. Well, do you believe in fortune tellers?

tomk:  The last time I consulted one, about a decade or so ago, I was told I would soon meet a wise, funny, street smart Canadian with great financial success who would become my most valuable partner. And that’s when I met Ryan Reynolds at a convenience store bathroom. I would offer to show you the Deadpool 3 script I anonymously co-wrote, but Blake Lively said you’ll be happier if you don’t see it because of something she called the Gossip Girl Incident.

So I guess I do.

jimmy:  Huh.  And I was going to make a comment wondering if Aunt Wu was “correct” when she predicted that village wouldn’t be destroyed, but it’s hard to follow that up.

tomk:  I think Aunt Wu knows how well her predictions work judging by what she said to Aang at the end of the episode.

jimmy:  That he owed her $19.95 for the first minute and $2.95 for each additional minute?

tomk:  Katara said Aunt Wu doesn’t charge.

jimmy:  Odd that she would say that to Aang then.

tomk:  Aang had her figured out. He wasn’t loudly contradicting her like Sokka or a blind believer like Katara.

He just made a quiet observation about one of Aunt Wu’s predictions being made up.

jimmy:  A lot of it is ambiguous or coincidence, or just playing the percentages.  But I loved Sokka’s point with the red shoes.

tomk:  Sokka doesn’t get enough credit from people.

jimmy:  Maybe because he so often acts like a buffoon the rest of the time.

tomk:  Oh, and is he any less foolish than a man who dodges a platypus bear?

jimmy:  He had it all under control.

tomk:  The bear or the fool?

jimmy:  The fool apparently.

tomk:  Only because Appa showed up.

jimmy:  And then he laid an egg, as bears are known to do.

tomk:  The platypus does lay eggs.

jimmy:  So I see. How odd.

tomk:  It had a duckbill, Jimmy.

jimmy:  Yes. Just odd that a platypus lays eggs.

tomk:  They do, Jimmy. One of two mammals that do. The other is the spiny anteater.

jimmy:  That was that old guy’s nickname in high school.

tomk:  Probably back when Aunt Wu turned him down for the prom.

jimmy:  Would you want to go to prom with a guy named Spiny Anteater?

tomk:  I wouldn’t want to go to the prom with a guy, no.

jimmy:  No.

tomk:  I’d rather go to prom with Anne Hathaway.

jimmy:  Oh.  Good choice.

tomk:  Even if her nickname is Spiny Anteater.

jimmy:  Yes. Even if.

tomk:  By the by, Cousin Minka says Aunt Wu told her to never go to prom with you.  Something about a horrible antler accident.

jimmy:  Now it all makes sense.

tomk:  Of course it does.  Now enjoy your papaya.

jimmy:  I don’t know if I like papaya.

tomk:  Then don’t have it for breakfast.

jimmy:  Even if a fortune teller told me to?

tomk:  You said above you didn’t listen to fortunetellers.

jimmy:  Then I guess I won’t have papaya.

tomk:  Right.  I got just the thing for you.

jimmy:  Hmm. Papaya it is.

tomk:  That or you can have this plate of bacon and egg.  The egg came from a platypus bear.

jimmy:  Hmm. Papaya it is.

tomk:  Congratulations.  You are the new Papaya King.

The title is merely ceremonial.

jimmy:  Papayas for life!

tomk:  Well, you seem happy with your new title. I guess I will give Ryan the keys to the giant robot.

jimmy:  Maybe I should consult Aunt Wu on these kind of life decisions.

tomk:  Or you can rely on the opposite of your instincts.

jimmy:  It’ll probably work out either way.

tomk:  You may be right. Maybe you can be a fortuneteller.

jimmy:  I knew you were going to say that!

tomk:  You did correctly predict Lex Luthor would defeat Darkseid at the end of JLU.

jimmy:  I did?  I did!

tomk:  You did. Have a victory cake.

jimmy:  I knew I would get a cake!

tomk:  And a steak dinner?

jimmy:  Ah, um, of course!

tomk:  The main course.

jimmy:  I’ll need my strength to climb that volcano.

tomk:  Someone has to check those things.

jimmy:  So that guy that climbed up and got the first flower wasn’t like “oh man, that doesn’t look good, maybe I should tell someone”?

tomk:  He listened to Aunt Wu.

jimmy:  Maybe his reporting it is what would have saved the village.

tomk:  That was Aang’s job.

jimmy:  Sure, but how did that guy know?

tomk:  Aunt Wu told him.

jimmy:  …maybe.

tomk:  Those people were pretty helpless.

jimmy:  They’re not a powerful air bender.

tomk:  Or a 12 year old worried about his love life.

jimmy:  Is 12 too young to have a crush and wonder who he’s going to marry?

tomk:  Well…let’s just say the one plotline for this show I never much cared for was Aang’s love for Katara.  12 is fine to wonder about that, but he sometimes talks like he’s deeply in love and all that in a way that seems a little too old for the character.  Sokka or Zuko’s having girlfriends is fine.  Those guys are older.  Aang just feels too young to worry that much about that.

jimmy:  He had a lot of time to think about what he wanted in a girl while in that iceberg for 100 years.

tomk:  And he chose the first one he saw.

jimmy:  If he likes her he likes her.

tomk:  Were you that into a girl when you were 12, Jimmy?

jimmy:  12…that would be…grade 7.  I don’t remember specifically, but would have definitely been near or on the horizon.

tomk:  I dunno.  I’m not saying it’s wrong or something, just I don’t care for this one plotline.

jimmy:  Most shows have a love story.

tomk:  I know. I just can’t bring myself to care about Aang’s romantic problems.

jimmy:  That’s ok.

He probably doesn’t care about yours.

tomk:  I wouldn’t expect him to be. He has bigger problems to deal with.

jimmy:  Like cloud bending.

tomk:  Just like that. Or saving the village from its own silliness.

jimmy:  Aunt Wu said the village wouldn’t be destroyed and it wasn’t, so who’s silly now?

tomk:  I don’t know. I just think that’s an awful lot that can be read into these situations.

jimmy:  That’s how they work. Vague, mysterious, ambiguous, reading physical cues, emotional cues, name tags.

tomk:  Is that why you are still wearing those red shoes?

jimmy:  Nah. I already found my true love. Or so I’m told.

tomk:  Is your one true love the one who told you?

jimmy:  Yes.

tomk:  Then it must be true. Or else.

jimmy:  And I’m not a powerful air bender either. I break wind, but that’s a whole different thing.

tomk:  That explains some of the smells from your office.  I always assumed it was Wet Moose.

jimmy:  That too.

tomk:  Also, a strong smell of fresh donuts.

jimmy:  When we can keep Jenny at bay.

tomk:  Well, I think when we get to Jenny and the Donut Stash, it may be time to move on.

jimmy:  Mayhaps.

tomk:  Unless you have more to say about Aunt Wu or  Aang Vs the Volcano.

jimmy:  Nope.

tomk:  Then maybe we should let Sokka and Katara catch up with an old friend.

jimmy:  We should.

tomk:  In that case, we will.

NEXT TIME:  Tom and Jimmy will be back with more Last Airbender chat.  Be back soon when they cover the episodes “Bato of the Water Tribe” and “The Deserter.”