Weekend Trek “A Fistful Of Datas”

Sometimes, Star Trek can just be a little silly. And that is A-OK as Jimmy and Tom discuss below.

“A Fistful of Datas”

Worf, Troi, and Alexander find themselves trapped in a malfunctioning Wild West holodeck adventure.

jimmy: Bordering on silly, but oh so good.

tomk: You always like it when Alexander finds himself in deadly peril.

jimmy: I’m just glad he instinctively knew to hide behind that water barrel that could stop bullets.

tomk: I would also accept a bulletproof sofa.

jimmy: Not many of them in front of saloons.

tomk: No, those are more action movie staples.

jimmy: Good thing this is a spaghetti western.

tomk: Are you asking for a plate of spaghetti?

jimmy: No. But if one were to appear…

tomk: Nah, just this fettuccine alfredo.

jimmy: That’ll do. At least it’s not Spot food.

tomk: Or Data’s poetry everywhere.

jimmy: Wouldn’t Riker know the words were wrong and stop reading them?

tomk: Does Riker look like someone who reads scripts in advance?

jimmy: No…but it wasn’t their first time doing the scene.

tomk: This is why you should use hardcopies.

And get Picard for the butler.

jimmy: He was not impressed it was not the lead.

tomk: He said he wasn’t much of an actor. And he said it so convincingly because Patrick Stewart is a great actor.

jimmy: Haha, so true. But he was put off when she said it was a small role.

tomk: He’s a short man and all.

jimmy: He’s 5’10”. Not that short.

tomk: I am 6’5” and could crush such a man with one misplaced stride!

jimmy: Well, most are short to you. That doesn’t make them short in the world eye view.

tomk: Oh, and you’re probably four meters tall with your Canadian metric system.

jimmy: I have no idea.

tomk: Like how Worf went to Deadwood and didn’t meet Al Swearengen?

jimmy: Good. Cause Deadwood sucked after like episode 4.

tomk: Would it have been better if Worf was there?

jimmy: Isn’t everything?

tomk: Nothing could make Morbius better.

jimmy: I wouldn’t know.

tomk: Or you did and blacked it out of your memory, like that time Ryan took you to that musical theater celebration in Halifax.

jimmy: I don’t remember that.

tomk: See?

jimmy: Hey, you’re right!

tomk: But where would we be without a holodeck full of Datas?

jimmy: Worf would be relieved. Especially without that last Data.

tomk: Barclay is such a dead man when Worf finds him.

jimmy: Probably why he never appears again.

tomk: Well, not until a later episode.

And the First Contact movie.

Plus a lot of Voyager episodes.

jimmy: Hey, I had a 50/50 shot.

tomk: Worf had worse odds without the forcefield.

jimmy: Good thing Worf knew how to rig that up.

tomk: Yeah, with help from known engineering genius Troi.

jimmy: Known engineering genius and part time smoker.

tomk: She’s a smoker, a joker, a midnight toker, and Geordi’s study buddy.

And Riker would probably argue Troi is always smokin’.

jimmy: He would. And what was the story with Geordi’s “beard”? I thought it the beginning it would come into play on the holodeck, make him look more cowboy, but he never even appeared there.

tomk: You just want Data’s beard back instead?

jimmy: Well, yeah.

tomk:

Not as good as the facial hair in the holodeck.

jimmy: The holodeck facial hair program is pretty advanced.

tomk: Except when it breaks.

jimmy: Lol

tomk: That guy usually shows up when another show’s holodeck malfunctions.

jimmy: Haha, how have I not seen that before?

tomk: You’ve been rewatching the wrong franchise?

jimmy: Are you trying to ignite the age old Trek vs Wars fight?

tomk: Are you ignoring the age old Muppet vs Godzilla war?

jimmy: I can’t ignore what I don’t know about.

tomk: It wasn’t pretty. Radioactive felt was everywhere.

jimmy: That’s probably what shorted out the interface between the computer and Data’s brain. They accidentally used that felt to make Data’s hair.

tomk: …

You know what? I’m gonna let you have that one.

jimmy:

tomk: Now why don’t you try out the new office holodeck?

jimmy: Nice. I’ll run this “The Good, The Bad, and the Watson” program.

tomk: You mean the one where all the other characters eventually turn into Watson?

jimmy: Worst. Program. Ever.

tomk: You picked it.

jimmy: I was just trying to make a Sergio Leone joke, but didn’t consider the consequences.

tomk: This is why Worf wants to speak to you after he’s done talking to Barclay.

jimmy: Uh oh.

tomk: I wouldn’t worry too much. It’s a lot of Watsons, not Datas.

jimmy: One Watson is bad enough. At least on Trek we get to see them let Brent Spiner show what an underappreciated actor he is.

tomk: He’s one of the most popular characters. Wouldn’t it be better to say Marina Sirtis is the underappreciated actor?

jimmy: Being popular and being appreciated are two different things. He’s not exactly given anything to stretch his acting chops on with Data.

tomk: Being a mostly emotionless android who largely holds still is no easy task.

jimmy: Fair enough.

tomk: I mean, you don’t think Michael Dorn’s general awesomeness is somehow less impressive.

jimmy: No, but Worf has a variety of emotions. Sort of.

tomk: He sure does have multiple levels of anger and irritation.

jimmy: And one level of loving being a cowboy.

tomk: Wouldn’t you love to be a cowboy?

On a steel horse you could ride though you may be wanted dead or alive.

jimmy: Hopefully alive.

tomk: Obviously. No one likes a dead Jimmy.

jimmy: Especially you. But especially me.

tomk: And probably the Ms sleeping next to you.

jimmy: Hopefully. She would get all that sweet sweet life insurance money.

tomk: Let’s not test that theory.

jimmy: Agreed. So, did you enjoy the silliness? We haven’t even talked about non-Holodeck Data acting and talking like a cowboy.

tomk: That should have been a bigger clue.

jimmy: Well, they did know Worf and Troi were stuck in the Ancient West on the holodeck.

tomk: No one seemed anxious to get them out of there. Did no one miss the ship’s counselor and head of security?

jimmy: I can see them not missing Troi, but Worf? That said, Picard did yell at him to take a vacation. And I’m not sure they were trapped that long.

tomk: Barclay was probably waiting outside to start his Roman orgy program.

jimmy: With a ship that big, and roughly 1000 people on board, you’d think they’d have more than one holodeck.

tomk: Other people being terrorized by Datas.

jimmy: That only happens to the bridge crew and their children.

tomk: Worf probably has more excuses to avoid time with his son now.

jimmy: Or wants to spend more time with him on the holodeck.

tomk: That’s a better conclusion.

jimmy: Guess we’ll find out in the Season 7 episode “For A Few Datas More”.

tomk: Um, about that…

jimmy: Yes?

tomk: That episode may not exist.

jimmy: Dang.