April 21, 2024

Gabbing Geek

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Weekend Trek “A Fistful Of Datas”

A malfunction in the holodeck traps Worf, Alexander, and Troi in a simulation full of hostile copies of Data.

Sometimes, Star Trek can just be a little silly.  And that is A-OK as Jimmy and Tom discuss below.

“A Fistful of Datas”

Worf, Troi, and Alexander find themselves trapped in a malfunctioning Wild West holodeck adventure.

jimmy:  Bordering on silly, but oh so good.

tomk:  You always like it when Alexander finds himself in deadly peril.

jimmy:  I’m just glad he instinctively knew to hide behind that water barrel that could stop bullets.

tomk:  I would also accept a bulletproof sofa.

jimmy:  Not many of them in front of saloons.

tomk:  No, those are more action movie staples.

jimmy:  Good thing this is a spaghetti western.

tomk:  Are you asking for a plate of spaghetti?

jimmy:  No.  But if one were to appear…

tomk:  Nah, just this fettuccine alfredo.

jimmy:  That’ll do.  At least it’s not Spot food.

tomk:  Or Data’s poetry everywhere.

jimmy:  Wouldn’t Riker know the words were wrong and stop reading them?

tomk:  Does Riker look like someone who reads scripts in advance?

jimmy:  No…but it wasn’t their first time doing the scene.

tomk:  This is why you should use hardcopies.

And get Picard for the butler.

jimmy:  He was not impressed it was not the lead.

tomk:  He said he wasn’t much of an actor.  And he said it so convincingly because Patrick Stewart is a great actor.

jimmy:  Haha, so true.  But he was put off when she said it was a small role.

tomk:  He’s a short man and all.

jimmy:  He’s 5’10”. Not that short.

tomk:  I am 6’5” and could crush such a man with one misplaced stride!

jimmy:  Well, most are short to you. That doesn’t make them short in the world eye view.

tomk:  Oh, and you’re probably four meters tall with your  Canadian metric system.

jimmy:  I have no idea.

tomk:  Like how Worf went to Deadwood and didn’t meet Al Swearengen?

jimmy:  Good. Cause Deadwood sucked after like episode 4.

tomk:  Would it have been better if Worf was there?

jimmy:  Isn’t everything?

tomk:  Nothing could make Morbius better.

jimmy:  I wouldn’t know.

tomk:  Or you did and blacked it out of your memory, like that time Ryan took you to that musical theater celebration in Halifax.

jimmy:  I don’t remember that.

tomk:  See?

jimmy:  Hey, you’re right!

tomk:  But where would we be without a holodeck full of Datas?

jimmy:  Worf would be relieved.  Especially without that last Data.

tomk:  Barclay is such a dead man when Worf finds him.

jimmy:  Probably why he never appears again.

tomk:  Well, not until a later episode.

And the First Contact movie.

Plus a lot of Voyager episodes.

jimmy:  Hey, I had a 50/50 shot.

tomk:  Worf had worse odds without the forcefield.

jimmy:  Good thing Worf knew how to rig that up.

tomk:  Yeah, with help from known engineering genius Troi.

jimmy:  Known engineering genius and part time smoker.

tomk:  She’s a smoker, a joker, a midnight toker, and Geordi’s study buddy.

And Riker would probably argue Troi is always smokin’.

jimmy:  He would.  And what was the story with Geordi’s “beard”?  I thought it the beginning it would come into play on the holodeck, make him look more cowboy, but he never even appeared there.

tomk:  You just want Data’s beard back instead?

jimmy:  Well, yeah.

tomk:

Not as good as the facial hair in the holodeck.

jimmy:  The holodeck facial hair program is pretty advanced.

tomk:  Except when it breaks.

jimmy:  Lol

tomk:  That guy usually shows up when another show’s holodeck malfunctions.

jimmy:  Haha, how have I not seen that before?

tomk:  You’ve been rewatching the wrong franchise?

jimmy:  Are you trying to ignite the age old Trek vs Wars fight?

tomk:  Are you ignoring the age old Muppet vs Godzilla war?

jimmy:  I can’t ignore what I don’t know about.

tomk:  It wasn’t pretty. Radioactive felt was everywhere.

jimmy:  That’s probably what shorted out the interface between the computer and Data’s brain.  They accidentally used that felt to make Data’s hair.

tomk: 

You know what?  I’m gonna let you have that one.

jimmy:  :slightly_smiling_face:

tomk:  Now why don’t you try out the new office holodeck?

jimmy:  Nice.  I’ll run this “The Good, The Bad, and the Watson” program.

tomk:  You mean the one where all the other characters eventually turn into Watson?

jimmy:  Worst.  Program.  Ever.

tomk:  You picked it.

jimmy:  I was just trying to make a Sergio Leone joke, but didn’t consider the consequences.

tomk:  This is why Worf wants to speak to you after he’s done talking to Barclay.

jimmy:  Uh oh.

tomk:  I wouldn’t worry too much. It’s a lot of Watsons, not Datas.

jimmy:  One Watson is bad enough.  At least on Trek we get to see them let Brent Spiner show what an underappreciated actor he is.

tomk:  He’s one of the most popular characters.  Wouldn’t it be better to say Marina Sirtis is the underappreciated actor?

jimmy:  Being popular and being appreciated are two different things.  He’s not exactly given anything to stretch his acting chops on with Data.

tomk:  Being a mostly emotionless android who largely holds still is no easy task.

jimmy:  Fair enough.

tomk:  I mean, you don’t think Michael Dorn’s general awesomeness is somehow less impressive.

jimmy:  No, but Worf has a variety of emotions. Sort of.

tomk:  He sure does have multiple levels of anger and irritation.

jimmy:  And one level of loving being a cowboy.

tomk:  Wouldn’t you love to be a cowboy?

On a steel horse you could ride though you may be wanted dead or alive.

jimmy:  Hopefully alive.

tomk:  Obviously. No one likes a dead Jimmy.

jimmy:  Especially you. But especially me.

tomk:  And probably the Ms sleeping next to you.

jimmy:  Hopefully. She would get all that sweet sweet life insurance money.

tomk:  Let’s not test that theory.

jimmy:  Agreed. So, did you enjoy the silliness?  We haven’t even talked about non-Holodeck Data acting and talking like a cowboy.

tomk:  That should have been a bigger clue.

jimmy:  Well, they did know Worf and Troi were stuck in the Ancient West on the holodeck.

tomk:  No one seemed anxious to get them out of there. Did no one miss the ship’s counselor and head of security?

jimmy:  I can see them not missing Troi, but Worf?  That said, Picard did yell at him to take a vacation. And I’m not sure they were trapped that long.

tomk:  Barclay was probably waiting outside to start his Roman orgy program.

jimmy:  With a ship that big, and roughly 1000 people on board, you’d think they’d have more than one holodeck.

tomk:  Other people being terrorized by Datas.

jimmy:  That only happens to the bridge crew and their children.

tomk:  Worf probably has more excuses to avoid time with his son now.

jimmy:  Or wants to spend more time with him on the holodeck.

tomk:  That’s a better conclusion.

jimmy:  Guess we’ll find out in the Season 7 episode “For A Few Datas More”.

tomk:  Um, about that…

jimmy:  Yes?

tomk:  That episode may not exist.

jimmy:  Dang.

tomk:  Lots of weird things exist, just not that. I mean someone made this:

jimmy:  “For A Few Datas More” would have been better.

tomk:  Probably. But all I know for certain is if you threaten Alexander, Worf will take you out to the curb like it’s, you know….

jimmy:  And that’s never good.

tomk:  Well, what is good? Should we let Data make ethical decisions about new potential life forms?

jimmy:  Yes?

tomk:  Would you want to see how that would turn out?

jimmy:  Yes.

tomk:  Well, good.  Data likes other robots it turns out.

jimmy:  Yes!

tomk:  Ready?

jimmy:  Yes.?!

tomk:  I think I need to teach you about proper punctuation between episode chats, but here goes.

Next:  “The Quality of Life”