October 7, 2022

Gabbing Geek

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Going Through The Avengers: Earth’s Mightiest Heroes Part Five

Jimmy and Tom chat the Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes episodes "Everything Is Wonderful" and "Panther's Quest".

Oh look!  Jimmy and Tom finished the chat on two more episodes of The Avengers: Earth’s Mightiest Heroes!

Yes, they had some thoughts on the episodes “Everything is Wonderful” and “Panther’s Quest”.

“Everything is Wonderful”

Tony’s latest business moves enrage a businessman, and when Simon Williams is mad, he might do something drastic.

jimmy:  This was kinda like that episode of Three’s Company with the misunderstanding.

tomk:  No one lets Tony speak.

Then again, if he went to Simon before he started buying out the company…

jimmy:  Yeah, there certainly was no time for explanations beforehand.

tomk:  And maybe if Hank or Simon actually let Tony explain a few things. Then again, I am starting to think Hank is worthless since every time he goes big, he gets easily swatted by a bad guy.

jimmy:  In fairness, Simon was no pushover.

tomk:  True, but it’s just a pattern I have seen with Hank so far. Janet has been better in fights so far if she and Thor are taking down MODOK.

jimmy:  Hank doesn’t really want to fight.

tomk:  He shouldn’t. He kinda sucks at it.

jimmy:  Perhaps there is a school he can attend to work on that.

tomk:  Hank or Derek?

jimmy:  Only one of them will fit inside.

tomk:  That’s actually the Big House.

jimmy:  Ironic.

tomk:  You can see little Ultrons shaking their fists at Zoolander to get off their lawn.

jimmy:  Hank’s not a fan of either of them.

tomk:  Hank is a big fan of sanctimonious lectures and Not Listening.

jimmy:  That’s true. But maybe if Tony was better at getting to the point…

tomk:  Hank kept interrupting. Tony had no excuse with Simon, but Hank is a different story. You know Steve would have patiently listened before casting judgement.

jimmy:  Hank’s no Captain America.

tomk:  No one else is.

They all just turn out to be freaks like Simon and MODOK or jerks like Tony and maybe Nick Fury.

jimmy:  The whole Wonder Man is a wolf in sheep’s clothing is straight out of the Lee/Kirby days is it not?

tomk:  It is. He started as a bad guy pretending to a hero to join the team. But then he realized the Avengers were good and died betraying the villains. But then he got better later.

jimmy:  They usually do.

tomk:  Look, just because it happened with Wonder Man and the Vision and the Swordsman (twice) doesn’t mean it…what was I saying again?

jimmy:  How Wonder Man’s ionic look was much more modern than his original comic debut?  (Though he did wear that suit pre-powers.)

tomk:  That sounds right. It’s not like I put a Wonder Man comment in the wrong chat and had to delete it. Have a keg of your favorite beer.

jimmy:  Awesome!

tomk:  In fact, have two and some pizza. Toss yourself a party.

jimmy:  You’re invited.

tomk:  I assumed as much. It’s a No-Watsons-No-Williams party, I assume.

jimmy:  For sure.

tomk:  They can have their own party.

jimmy:  That’s a very different party. Only Cap would get invited to.

tomk:  And he’s too polite to decline.

jimmy:  And his shield is the only defense against ionic energy apparently.

tomk:  That shield can repel anything. Even bad intentions.

jimmy:  It’s mighy.

tomk:  You should really get one for your mancave.

jimmy:  I should. The one I have now is only made from aluminum foil. It’s not very mighty.

tomk:  Not even a trash can lid?

jimmy:  That one was plastic.

tomk:  Probably more study than aluminum foil.

jimmy:  You’d think that wouldn’t you?

tomk:  I would also think MODOK wouldn’t realize how big a target his face is.

jimmy:  So what’s MODOK’s deal?  Was he a regular Joe once?

tomk:  I think so. He was an AIM experiment that went a little rogue.

And there’s a female version called MODAM.

jimmy:  His head got too big.

Huh. Never heard of MODAM.

tomk:  She exists.

jimmy:  Disturbing.

tomk:  Well, don’t take her to the prom.

jimmy:  I wish I was young enough to go to a prom.

tomk:  Without having a lot of people staring at you?

jimmy:  Why would they stare at me?

tomk:  Because you’re some older guy at the prom?

jimmy:  Hence the wish I was younger part.

tomk:  But my point is you can still go to the prom.  People will just be wondering why.

Then again, that could add mystique.

jimmy:  And the arrest charges.

tomk:  Not if you go there with your posse to stop AIM agents.

jimmy:  Those guys are mostly useless.

tomk:  The Moose, the Beaver, Captain Jake, and Cousin Minka are useless?

jimmy:  I meant the AIM agents.

tomk:  Oh, well, obviously.  I think half your posse can take them all out by themselves.  And it doesn’t even matter which half.

jimmy:  What kind of a name is AIM anyway?  And by the sounds of it, they had that name and tried to figure out what the acronym stood for as who names their organization “Advanced Idea Mechanics”?

tomk:  Dorks?

jimmy:  Haha. If the shoe fits…

tomk:  But the Grim Reaper, does he work for AIM or HYDRA?

jimmy:  A little from column A, a little from column B?

tomk:  Well, that works. Anything else to add here, Jimmy?

jimmy:  These guys got a long way to go to act like a team?

tomk:  Thor and Wasp seem to be doing OK.

jimmy:  True.

tomk:  Maybe it’s just Hank and Tony.

jimmy:  It’s always the smart ones.

tomk:  Like Ryan and the Beaver?

jimmy:  Well, the Beaver…

tomk:  He did accuse Ryan of chewing on his favorite stick.

jimmy:  He’s like that.

tomk:  Well, that has nothing to do with AIM, the Masters of Evil, or Wonder Man.

jimmy:  No. It doesn’t. But I bet the next episode does.

tomk:  Or it could be about some guy that’s been hanging around on the outskirts.

jimmy:  Or that.

tomk:  Like, maybe it’s time for another Avenger to sign up.

jimmy:  We should find out.

tomk:  Yeah. It could be someone like Stingray, Foolkiller, or Nightwatch.

jimmy:  …it could…

tomk:  But it’s probably someone cool.

jimmy:  That would be better.

tomk:  Good news:  it is better.

“Panther’s Quest”

The Avengers accompany a mysterious figure to the remote nation of Wakanda!

jimmy:  Not quite purple spandex Klaw, but getting closer.

tomk:  He and Simon shop at the same store.

jimmy:  They do have a very similar design.

tomk:  Must be the Grim Reaper’s doing.

jimmy:  He is a common denominator.

tomk:  He must like the color purple.

jimmy:  I think he’d be more of a fan of the movie.

tomk:  Everyone loves Whoopi Goldberg.

jimmy:  She played Guinan.

tomk:  Yes. You get a candy bar.

jimmy:  Score!

tomk:  It’s a Milky Way to represent where Thor was for this episode.

jimmy:  He didn’t check his voicemail.

tomk:  Does he know how?

jimmy:  Probably not.

tomk:  And Pepper thought the Hulk needed lessons

jimmy:  Pepper thinks that about everyone.

tomk:  Too bad. They could have used Thor or the Hulk on a mission like this.

jimmy:  Or some earplugs.

tomk:  All I know is Hank went big and had his ass handed to him…again.

jimmy:  You’re not letting that go are you?

tomk:  Is this the same Jimmy Impossible who noted how often Justice League knocked out Martian Manhunter?

jimmy:  We’re talking about you, Tom, not me.

tomk:  It’s just an observation about potential hypocrisy. No reason to get defensive aside from that’s every reason to get defensive.

jimmy:  You never observe that everywhere Hank goes there are lots and lots of ants.

tomk:  But Jimmy, ants are everywhere.

jimmy:  Everywhere?  In pants?

tomk:  Eh, sometimes.

jimmy:  Wow. Good power to have then.

tomk:  Yeah, Hank is much more useful tiny.

jimmy:  What if there were giant ants everywhere?

tomk:  Don’t you remember he had a flying ant bite Graviton?  Ants are resistant to gravity.

But sadly, giant ants are not and would be crushed by their own body weight.

jimmy:  And get their asses kicked.

tomk:  Good news there:  ants lack asses.

jimmy:  How do they keep their pants on?!?

tomk:  Special ant pants.

jimmy:  This chat has been very educational.

tomk:  See, what Hank should be doing is sending giant ants after bad guys and then shrinking them down again before they suffocate. There are so many ants everywhere, with and without pants, that he can be constantly growing and shrinking different ants to stop just about everyone.

Instead, he makes himself feel like a big man, lectures Tony, and builds killer robots.

jimmy:  Killer robots are cooler than ants in pants.

tomk:  Well, depends on whom they are killing.

jimmy:

tomk:  See?  They make good neighbors.

jimmy:  They’re A-Ok.

tomk:  Much better than Ultron, but that’s for later.

jimmy:  Now we have to talk about Wakanda, Tony thinking he knows better than everyone else, and a guy made of sound.

tomk:  Wakanda is a land of mystery and intrigue. Tony’s thinking he knows better is the show’s subtitle.  Klaw is made of sound now.

jimmy:  “I’m made out of sound now.”  Great Weird Al parody.

tomk:  It’s right up there with “Green and Angry”.

jimmy:  That’s good too.

tomk:  Is it as good as T’Challa reclaiming his throne only to leave again?

jimmy:  No?

tomk:  Eh, probably.

jimmy:  He defeated Man-Ape, what else do those needy Wakandans want?

tomk:  Freedom of the press?

jimmy:  That’s overrated. Ask your ex-President.

tomk:  Pass.

You might want to ask your new neighbor.

jimmy:  That’s his Mexican non-union equivalent.

tomk:  Is there something wrong with Mr. Snrub?

jimmy:  His dog :hankey: on my lawn, but otherwise he’s ok.

tomk:  Sounds better than what happens when the Man-Ape’s dog does that.

jimmy:  I let his dog go wherever he likes.

tomk:  But then he throws it.

jimmy:  Ummm…maybe we should talk about something else?

tomk:  The Black Panther joined the team pretty easily after he proved he could make a lot of them look like chumps without trying too hard.

jimmy:  Sometimes you just need some friends.

tomk:  Unless he’s doing like he did during the Christopher Priest run that basically made the Panther the character he is today and only joined the Avengers so he can spy on them from the inside and determine their weaknesses if he ever needs to take them down to protect Wakanda.

jimmy:  Sounds Batman-ian.

tomk:  Well, I think Priest planned his Panther as basically being a “King Batman” kind of character.

jimmy:  King Batman. I like it.

tomk:  Yes, so, a master planner who is basically always ten steps ahead of everybody and even keeps an anti-Galactus plan in his desk drawer that may or may not be serious.  He never answered when asked about it.

jimmy:  King Batman doesn’t have to answer to anyone.

tomk:  And it turned out, while his original reasons for joined was espionage, he did develop friendships on the team, and Steve was pretty understanding about the whole thing.

jimmy:  He usually is.

tomk:  I mean, you were pretty mad when you learned that the Beaver only originally befriended the Moose to protect his dam.

jimmy:  I’m not as understanding as Captain America.

tomk:  You aren’t even as understanding as Lt. Nova Scotia.

But at least you’re more tolerant than Sgt Manitoba. 

jimmy:  I like to stay in the middle.

tomk:  And people love you so much for it, they sent you a year’s supply of Snickers bars and potato chips.  See, the label says “From the Jimmy Impossible Fanclub, totally not HYDRA.”

jimmy:  Does that label seem suspicious to you?

tomk:  Who me?  Don’t you have a fan club?

jimmy:  I do. And they’re definitely not Hydra.

tomk:  Then I am sure these aren’t the sort of booby trapped snacks that are merely a pretext to get at that vibranium mound under your shed.

jimmy:  Sounds good. I got big plans for that vibranium, I’d hate to see it fall in the wrong hands.

tomk:  Jimmy, I thought your mound was just a rock the size of a basketball.

jimmy:  That’s my plan. To make a vibranium basketball.

tomk:  Makes sense. I see no harm in a metallic basketball that deflects everything.

jimmy:  Would make me hard to defend.

tomk:  Better hope you get nothing but net when you shoot the ball.

jimmy:  It’s not a perfect plan.

tomk:  It’s better than Ryan’s plan to just lead a well-executed heist to steal the vibranium from HYDRA.

jimmy:  Ryan loves a good heist.

tomk:  Yeah, but his plan included Watson in a key role.

jimmy:  I see the problem here already.

tomk:  However, Ryan isn’t King Batman.

jimmy:  You’re God damned right.

tomk:  And you aren’t Heisenberg.

jimmy:  That would explain this lack of drugs and money around the house.

tomk:  More the drugs or the money?

jimmy:  Both.

tomk:  I see. Traded everything for that vibranium.

jimmy:  That stuff ain’t cheap.

tomk:  Well, I hope you learned a valuable lesson about underestimating the Black Panther.

jimmy:  Indeed I did!  Which was?

tomk:  You shouldn’t underestimate the Black Panther.

jimmy:  Got it!

tomk:  Well, if T’Challa is on the team, could other heroes be far behind?

jimmy:  I’m guessing…no?

tomk:  Maybe it’s time to check on a couple unless you have more to say about Wakanda.

jimmy:  I’m sure we’ll be back here if I need to.

tomk:  Well, you know the Leader is still at the Cube planning something.

jimmy:  Na na na na na na na na…Leader!

tomk:  And if you need to stop the Leader, there is one guy you should call.

jimmy:  Is he incredible?

tomk:  He might be Hawkeye.

jimmy:  Not that incredible.

tomk:  Or it might be someone else.

And you, Jimmy, are someone else.

jimmy:  I could be an Avenger.

tomk:  Or a Revenger. How well can you shout “Revengers resemble!” to summon the Amazing Bulk, Donar the Lord of Thunder, Steel Man, and Jenny in her Captain Marvel costume?

jimmy:  Probably not very.

tomk:  Then you probably can’t join. There’s always Alpha Flight.

jimmy:  It could be worse.

tomk:  Gamma Flight?

jimmy:  There you go.

tomk:  Well, Gamma Flight might be more appropriate for the next pair of episodes.

jimmy:  Pair eh?

tomk:  What?  You think you can stop the Leader without doing a two-parter?

jimmy:  No?

tomk:  Of course not.  Ready to see what it takes to defeat the Leader?

jimmy:  Let’s find out.

tomk:  Get your radiation suit ready for this one.

NEXT:  Tom and Jimmy will be back soon.  Come back and see their thoughts on the two part “Gamma World” and “Masters of Evil”.

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