Oh boy! Jeffrey Combs is back! That’s all I need to know about this episode!
OK, one other thing I may need to know is that the series at this point found a clever way to cover up Nana Visitor’s real world pregnancy. After an accident on a runabout, Keiko’s unborn child was transferred to Kira for the duration of the pregnancy. Of the different ways that the show could have handled her pregnancy, that may be the most interesting to say the least. Granted, once the fetus has been implanted and Kira starts showing, the rest of the episode involving that plot is mostly the collected O’Briens being very nice to Kira and having her move into their quarters for the duration. It’s…almost disturbingly sweet actually.
Given who the father of Visitor’s child was, it’s also perhaps intentionally ironic that Bashir does the fetal transplant.
But no, the rest of the episode is about Quark, and while Quark is unlikely to carry this plot further, given the complaint I had about the previous Bashir-based episode, Ferengi episodes of Deep Space Nine are generally entertaining enough. Regardless, Quark comes back from a trip to the homeworld unhappy. Apparently, he saw the most expensive doctor he could find only to be diagnosed with a rare, but always fatal, disease. He has a lot of debts he needs to clear up, so he’ll just have to sell his remains to be collected after he dies in a week or so. He does end up selling his corpse for a very large sum to a secret bidder, particularly since the only other offer came from Rom, and Rom doesn’t have much himself.
Funny thing: Quark won’t ask Bashir for a second opinion because Bashir doesn’t charge money, but then he gets news through Bashir that he’s actually going to be fine.
Quark’s first thought: he can sue the doctor!
Quark’s second thought: who paid all that money for Quark’s body? The Grand Nagus might have that kinda dough lying around, but no, it was Liquidator Brunt.
Oh man, Jeffrey Combs is back!
Wait, why does Brunt want Quark’s remains? Does he even like Quark?
Of course he doesn’t!
Quark, it seems, is the worst kind of Ferengi in Brunt’s eyes: a philanthropist. He let his mother earn profit and tried to cover it up. He let his bar unionize. Heck, there’s a vacation fund! He even sold Bajoran refugees necessities at (slightly above) cost! Quark is nothing but a rotten hue-manitarian to the likes of Brunt. And no, he won’t take a refund. Quark needs to somehow deliver his own remains within a week or else violate the Rules of Acquisition.
Huh. That seems a wee bit extreme. Oh wait, these are the Ferengi I’m talking about.
And Quark, being Quark, adores the Rules so much, he tries to take a contract out with Garek. Rom assumes Quark is trying to get Brunt killed, but no, it’s for a suicide case.
Look, obviously Quark doesn’t die. He still has a few seasons of the show to hang around for. He changes his mind after a dream where the first Grand Nagus, Gint, tells Quark that the Rules were intended to be guidelines, but “rules” were used as the title to sell more copies. Oh, and since it was a dream, Gint looks like an elderly Rom.
So yeah, Quark breaks a contract, and Brunt confiscates everything in Quark’s bar, proclaiming that Quark can no longer associate or do business with any other Ferengi…except for Rom apparently, but he’s an engineer. Quark does still have a shirt, but he has to send that to Brunt in the morning.
Man, that Brunt is a jerk.
Fortunately, people around the station actually like Quark and start “giving” him things they don’t need or want to rebuild the bar, ostensibly to solve a storage problem since Quark suddenly has a lot of empty space. Sure, he’ll still charge the station, but it does mean he’s back in business because he somehow made friends. Even Odo is helping out, even if he doesn’t sound too pleased about it.
Still, good Quark episode, and I got me some more Jeffrey Combs. Life is good.