Before I get to the transcript for the chat Jimmy and I had over this episode, I just want to say that since I started adding scene clips at the start of these, that every so often I find one that doesn’t have a lot of options.
This is one of those episodes, but the clip I did find…well, it did feel like it might be at least a little bit worth it.
Strange psychic attacks start leaving members of the crew in mysterious comas!
jimmy: The comas and sexual assaults wouldn’t be great, but I could really use those memory guys.
tomk: Why? So you can remember how this episode had Keiko but not Miles or how Worf knocked that jerkass guy out with a single slap in the end?
jimmy: Those things I remember.
tomk: You just want someone to help you find your keys.
jimmy: How else am I going to get into the Executive washroom?
tomk: Take Watson’s?
jimmy: Now there’s an idea.
tomk: In fact, I have been holding onto your keys for safekeeping.
jimmy: Great. I guess I should cancel my appointment with the memory aliens then.
tomk: Did you remember to turn off the stove in the break room?
jimmy: Umm…I’ll be right back…
tomk: I hope Jimmy doesn’t slip into a coma after a traumatic memory where he and the Ms are wearing obvious wigs before he gets back.
jimmy: I paid a lot for this wig, I hope it’s not obvious!
tomk: It is blue.
jimmy: That’s the style these days on Ullian.
tomk: And obvious.
jimmy: I didn’t know you were so anti-wig, Tom.
tomk: I’m not. It’s just obvious you didn’t grow two feet of blue hair in ten minutes.
jimmy: Are you sure about that?
tomk: Because that’s not how the Force (or hair) works.
jimmy: You win this one.
tomk: And I don’t need those memory historians with the questionable fashion habits.
jimmy: Yeah the holy (not Holy) robes were a bit distracting.
tomk: And you really shouldn’t wear white after Labor Day.
jimmy: Is there a Labor Day in space?
tomk: I don’t even know if there’s one in Canada.
jimmy: Lol, there is.
tomk: Well, then they can have one in space.
jimmy: I bet they get 2 days off for Space Thanksgiving too.
tomk: Well obviously.
jimmy: Lucky bastards.
tomk: Yeah, all that hard work they do…flying places and letting machines carry stuff.
jimmy: Enough about space holidays, let’s get back to the sexual assaults!
You need to work on how you phrase things, Jimmy.
jimmy: Or the letting crewmen die!
tomk: OK, that’s….better?
jimmy: How about dead husbands?!?
(Or bad toupees?)
I think the judges are skipping this one.
jimmy: I feel like the Picard wig was an in joke.
tomk: Well, the Crusher wig was…very long.
jimmy: A lot of wig talk in this chat.
tomk: Yes, well, it beats wondering how many of those memories were manufactured by Jerky McJerkface.
jimmy: I assumed the memories were real.
tomk: So…Riker did something to Troi?
jimmy: Well, no. But the original memory was there. The whole assault was added by J McJ.
tomk: I’ll bet he added all the wigs to Crusher’s memory too.
tomk: And for Riker, um…he didn’t have a beard the first time.
jimmy: I dunno. Maybe the other two weren’t as manipulated.
Unless none were manipulated, and things just got really awkward.
tomk: So, J McJ was just a jerk who got his jollies making people remember their worst moments? Or he made bad memories worse?
And why didn’t Picard use his own psychic powers to figure out what was going on?
jimmy: Both. And he just wanted to put the moves on Troi.
And nicely done.
tomk: Picard wanted to put the moves on Troi?
tomk: I see.
That seems more likely.
jimmy: Picard’s more of a Crusher man.
tomk: Well, Beverly actually seems useful. Jerky McJerkface went for Troi first, then Riker and Crusher…basically, the people he felt could figure out he was a McJerkface of Clan Asshole.
If he knew Data and Geordi were also looking into things…well, I’m sure Geordi has some bad memories about all the girls that turned him down.
jimmy: This could have easily become an episode where everyone but Data ends up in a coma.
tomk: Oh, would you try to put Worf in a coma?
jimmy: Is that like trying to put Baby in a corner?
tomk: So Worf is a baby now? I think there’s a Klingon at the door who wants to talk to you.
jimmy: Well, I can’t enter people’s conscious mind, so this is all irrelevant.
tomk: Are you sure?
Maybe you went into someone else’s mind once, got really scared, and blocked out that ability.
jimmy: It would explain why I can’t remember anything. I may have blocked out a lot.
tomk: Or maybe you keep hitting your head on an antler every time the Moose suddenly turns around. We should ask some of those memory guys who aren’t rapey.
jimmy: 2/3 of them are a-ok.
tomk: Yeah, but the crew didn’t know which 2/3 they were until Data checked some flight manifests.
jimmy: Though it was Geordi put them on the right path.
tomk: Geordi might be immune. His life seems to be like one long bad memory.
jimmy: So, I think he was attracted to Troi, and went after her first. Though, with that level of power, why make the whole experience rapey? He could have had any sort of peaceful encounter with her. There’s no particular reason to go after Riker and Crusher. Troi wasn’t talking. Not like they were close to figuring out what happened.
tomk: Riker talked tough to him. Crusher had some tests to run that might have outed him. And rape is always about power. If we want to get into the character more, it could have even been a form of lashing out given how much his dad talked down to him.
jimmy: Good points. I forgot Riker “threatened” him. Crusher was a candidate because of her investigation, but if anything, his actions outed him more than Riker or Crusher probably would have.
tomk: Because no one suspects the blind guy and his robot pal.
jimmy: They’re like the 24th Century Spanish Inquisition.
See, Riker and Crusher said what they were doing in front of Jerky. Geordi and Data just plugged along by themselves. So, Riker and Crusher were Shaggy and Scooby Doo attracting the attention of the thief in a mask while Geordi and Data were looking for clues and setting up a trap that might not even work.
Mostly because Worf just knocked that guy out with one half-assed punch.
jimmy: I guess Data was Velma and Geordi was Daphne. Worf, of course, was MVP.
tomk: Troi was doing a good job fending that guy off in the end. That guy wouldn’t even get past Troi Level for Worf’s workout program.
jimmy: Yeah, Troi would have probably finished him off if Worf hadn’t shown up.
tomk: And if Worf put any real effort into that hit, I think Jerky’s head would have done like that one guy in the Bluegills episode when Riker and Picard both shot him in the head with their phasers.
jimmy: Well, one of them did anyway.
tomk: One of them is better at fighting zombies.
jimmy: And would be better against Thanos.
tomk: I think it might be Picard. The beam hitting the chest is aimed downward, suggesting a taller person.
jimmy: Oh Riker.
tomk: Riker always aims for the heart.
That statement might have two meanings.
jimmy: Nicely done.
tomk: Well, with that in mind, do you have anything else to add here?
I mean, there might be more wigs or exploding heads or Spanish Inquisitions to look into.
jimmy: I think we’ve pushed the limits on all of those.
tomk: If you try to remember more, it might put you into a coma.
jimmy: Like our readers?
tomk: We have readers?
tomk: The judges are ready trying to stay out of this one.
jimmy: Maybe they will be ready for the next one.
tomk: Are you?
jimmy: I’ve hung up my wig and am ready to move on.
tomk: Then let’s go to the perfect society.
Weekend Trek “Ship In A Bottle”
Vikings: Valhalla “Pieces Of The Gods”
Noteworthy Issues: The Amazing Spider-Man #52 (September, 1967)