February 26, 2024

Gabbing Geek

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Brand New Cherry Flavor “Roman Candle”

Episode Three

OK, so, I think I learned a valuable lesson from this one:  always get as many details as possible before you hire a witch to put a curse on your enemies.

Lisa, clearly, did not do her research.

Now, to recap:  Lisa Nova came to Hollywood with her dynamite student film, catching the eye of onetime Hollywood heavyweight Lou Burke.  Though initially very helpful, Lou stole the rights to Lisa’s movie after she turned down his sexual advances twice.  Afterwards, she found a witch named Boro to cast a curse on Lou, and as payment, Lisa vomits up a live newborn kitten at least once a day for Boro’s own personal use.

Plus, I am still not sure if anyone actually believes in curses in this world.  Lou doesn’t seem to since, even after Lisa got the ingredients she needed with Lou’s own help and knowledge of why, his life is still going A-OK.  Heck, it seems to be going better.  It’s Lisa who is dealing with upchucking kittens and now a mysterious vine that is growing in her apartment.  About the only good thing about that vine is that, even though it is also infesting neighbor’s apartments, Lisa seems to be the only tenant in the building.  Now sure how anyone missed that before, but here we are…

So, really, Lisa should have checked Boro’s credentials.  Just because she lives in an indoor jungle with a couple zombies doesn’t mean she’s an effective witch.  Plus, Lou is trying to take Lisa under his wing and show her the ways of Hollywood now.  If he wasn’t such a dirtbag before, that would be a downright decent thing to do.

Boro insists that Lisa go to lunch with Lou, promising that Lou will soon show signs of the curse.  Is it bad?  Um, no.  It’s just a case of the hiccups that won’t go away.  Apparently, this is just one of those incremental curses…

Can Lisa speed things up?  Yes, if she gets Lou to somehow ingest the pollen of the only flower growing on that vine in her apartment.  There’s even a live worm in there.  She convinces hotshot actor Roy Hardaway to take her to Lou’s for some kind of movie screening, and once there, she gets Lou to snort the pollen (and the worm) when she promises it’s cocaine.

Man, there are so many things wrong with that sentence.

Boro is also at the party.  She has a plus one.  That plus one doesn’t talk much since she also seems to be a zombie.

Anyway, now Lou has that stuff in his system, what now?  Does he have…OK, now he just has a bad itch.

This is not much of a curse.  Maybe it isn’t so bad Lisa might have snorted some of that pollen too.  OK, the screening is for her movie, and Lou announces some other guy is the director for the big budget version, so really, who got cursed here?

Wait, that director just burst into flames while Lisa glared at him.  He may have died after he fell into the pool to try and extinguish the flames.

Um, who really got cursed here?