The Umbrella Academy “Valhalla”

You know, I am starting to think the most well-adjusted member of the Umbrella Academy, the one who seems the least messed-up by what Sir Reginald did to them, is Ben.

I mean, look at these guys!  FIve finally gets the seven of them together (though Klaus claims ghosts can’t time travel to Ben’s disappointment), and not only can the group of them not agree to work together, they all come to different conclusions on what they have to do.  Their father, possibly part of the JFK assassination, is a lead.  What do they all opt to do, knowing they have six days to stop the apocalypse?

Luther quits because he already tried to talk to their father, only for the man to flatly deny he would ever do anything like adopt children because, well, he hates children.  Luther can’t catch a break.

Diego wants the old man stopped because he made it his mission to save JFK.  Plus, he keeps thinking Vanya will be responsible for the end of the world again, something the others seem to have moved past, particularly Vanya who doesn’t even remember what she did.

Five seems able to stay on track, but then he spots Lila, and since he’d promised to kill her at the start of the episode, he goes off to get her.  Then again, he seemed to figure out the Handler was involved for some reason.

And as for Vanya, Allison, and Klaus, they opt to more or less come clean to their 1960s loved ones.  That’s Ray for Allison, Sissy the unhappy housewife for Vanya, and the cult for Klaus.

So, the group got together, debated what to do, and then split up again.  How typical.

Then again, there are other problems.  First, the Handler framed Diego for the death of one of the Silent Swedes.  That involved a landmine and a stolen throwing knife.  Oh, and one of them screamed at a viking funeral for the foot of the dead one (all they had left), so they’re not as Silent as I thought they were.

And second, Sir Reginald, the man who adopted Pogo after the baby chimp’s astronaut job almost killed him, invited the lot of them to a light supper.  Since that guy can’t help but not make things worse for these people, I can’t imagine it will go at all well.

He’s a bad, bad man is what I am saying.