You know, I am really digging Doom Patrol.
Why? Well, Mr. Nobody is both the narrator and the villain, and in the middle of recounting the pilot, the Chief, sitting next to him, actually asks him who he’s talk to.
Nobody replies he’s talking to Grant Morrison fans, people subscribing to the DC Universe streaming service, and the three or so people who stuck around after watching the first episode out of curiosity.
Oh, and there’s also a talking cockroach who is some kind of doomsday prophet.
Anyway, the town of Overton gets sucked into a vortex while the new Doom Patrol basically stand there and look confused. Eventually, the team bus with the Chief inside goes in, and Jane jumps after it Then the vortex closes, leaving behind three stunned weirdos and a wrecked town. What do they do from there?
Rita takes to housecleaning the mansion, confident the Chief will eventually come back. He always does.
Larry tries to take a bus out of town, but every time he tries to board, the Negative Spirit pops out, knocking him out. Then he tries a new ticket to a new place and…well, that was fun.
Cliff tries to catch the farting donkey.
And then in comes a new hero, a real hero…Cyborg! Hero of Detroit! Sure, he doesn’t quite get along with his dad (hey, it’s Phil Morris!), but he remembers the Chief helping him, so he’s here to help, and he can catch a donkey after listening to Cliff for a bit. And then the donkey vomits up Jane,.
Jane spends the rest of the episode transitioning like, pardon the unintended pun, crazy, and Cliff tries to get through to her, even watching the Chief’s old tapes on Jane and learning what he can about Jane’s many, many personalities.
As for the others, Vic notices the donkey has a keyhole-shaped hole in its mouth. Rita agrees to slime her way inside, but she gets sucked in, followed by Vic and Larry, and they get down to some origin-based torture from Nobody, who is a very pushy narrator that gets pissed when someone doesn’t do what he says they are going to do. Anyway, he does two things as far as experienced hero Vic is concerned: he suggests some of Vic’s memory may be fabricated memories caused by Silas Stone’s programming, and Vic realizes Nobody might actually be afraid of them.
Of course, he only realizes that after the Negative Spirit comes out of Larry and causes the donkey to explode. The town is restored, and Rita, Larry, and Vic are covered in donkey gore. That would be about when Jane comes out, feeling better, to say the donkey was a trap.
So, Vic decides to stay and Larry decides he and the Spirit need to somehow make some ground rules.
Say, there sure are a lot of giant scissors in the background of Stately Caulder Manor…
…that would be a Grant Morrison reference…