February 29, 2024

Gabbing Geek

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Vikings “Baldur”

Season Five, Episode Eighteen.

Did anything happen on Floki Island worth mentioning?  I’m not sure.

So I’ll skip him this week.

What we do have this week is pretty much everyone lining up against Ivar.  And I mean everyone.  Some of them just don’t know it yet.

Bjorn?  Still working with Harald about attacking Kattegat, but that relationship is fraying fast as Bjorn marries a woman Harald had his eye on.  That always happens with Harald…

Lagertha?  Well, she’s still in Wessex, and Judith found her in a weird fugue state that she snapped out of after seeing…wow.  Ragnar.  I miss Ragnar.  I think it was all recycled footage, but still…  Point is, Ivar wants her dead anyway, and she and Judith are bonding as Judith reveals she’s dying of breast cancer.

Ubbe?  Well, he and Torvi are meeting the three Danish viking kings to see if they’d prefer to settle the land or raid it.  Two say yes.  The third, the biggest, says no and Ubbe challenges him to one-on-one combat.  But that’s still Wessex and Ivar is still planning on going there.

Ivar’s wife?  Maybe.  She finally gave birth to a son.  They named him Baldur, and he was also crippled, so Ivar left the baby to die of exposure since it seems like he sort of wishes Ragnar had done the same to him.  That’s…a bit more complicated reasoning than I might have expected from this show.

Of course, the baby isn’t really Ivar’s, but he doesn’t seem to know that.

The people of Kattegat?  Well, someone nails a pig’s head to Ivar’s favorite statue, and the woman arrested for it points out Ragnar allowed them to say what they wanted.  And Ivar…lets her go?

Nah!  She’s grabbed outside, taken off, and burned alive with her family.  Was she the new Mrs. Hvitserk?  Maybe.  I can’t keep track of all these barely-named female characters.

Hvitserk?  Oh yes.  He does go see King Olaf, the needed ally to Kattegat in the frozen wastes, and after insulting the little fellow outside, he gets to meet Olaf in a sauna.  And Hvitserk thinks the fat naked guy is the Buddha.  Olaf asks Hvitserk what kind of man Ivar is, and Hvitserk tells the truth:  Ivar sucks.  He wants Olaf to attack Kattegat.  Olaf at first isn’t interested and ties Hvitserk up to sweat to death in the sauna, but then changes his mind for some reason.

So, yeah, everyone is after Ivar.