Here we have an episode that is about both Christmas and Valentine’s Day. You deal with that in your own way, hypothetical reader.
Yes, for Christmas, Mr. Burns actually gives out some good gifts to the Plant’s many employees for once. No one needs a stress ball with Burns’ face on it that threatens you when you try to squeeze it. No, instead, everyone gets some sort of Google Glass devise that has a name so close to Google Glass I am not going to bother to use the in-episode name for them. Homer loves his as it tells him fun facts about Lenny and Carl, how to get to a restaurant he can actually afford (the soup kitchen), what’s in a krustyburger (he only pauses briefly), and other general things that quickly irritate Marge.
Wearing them during snuggle time, even if the woman in the screen looked like Marge, doesn’t help.
Why would Burns hand out such expensive gifts? Simple. He can use them to spy on all his employees. Fortunately, the “death buttons” don’t really do anything, but he still sees what they all see.
While all this is going on, but also about two months later, Bart refuses to give a Valentine to Nelson. He was required to do so by the school, which sent an attachment video where guest star and PBS Frontline narrator Will Lyman explains how kids who don’t get Valentines turn out bad. But this is Nelson, so he gives Bart an “or else” and Bart eventually follows through with a homemade card that declares, “I fear you.” That says how he feels about Nelson and how everyone feels about the silly holiday to begin with. That’s the B-plot, and I’m done with it.
But Homer decides to let Marge have the glasses and then finds out life at the Plant is miserable when everyone else has a pair of the glasses and doesn’t even notice him. He tries Burns’ office and finds the video set-up. Is he mad? Naw. He’s curious. Then he sees Marge has a secret ice cream stash for Maggie behind some frozen veggies and she goes to therapy because Homer, well, he’s Homer.
He doesn’t take this very well, and his best advice–nay, his only advice–comes from Moe, who suggests not confronting Marge by telling the truth but by arranging an appointment himself after hers and “surprise” her in the office. Sure, he does so under the pseudonym of “Alias Fakename,” but he’s really trying. Maybe.
Fortunately, nothing bad happens because Homer realizes Marge goes to see the doctor every Wednesday, and she’s always in a great mood on Wednesdays when he comes home and a terrible one on Tuesdays. The doctor helps her stay happy, so he can keep a secret. Marge fails to see Homer behind a door, and since he didn’t cancel 24 hours in advance, gets a haircut from the therapist.
And sure, he offers to tell Marge about the glasses, but she’s high on some story involving Helen Lovejoy making a cake with salt instead of sugar, so she’ll never know, and then she and Homer can have some snuggling. Of course, Marge is wearing the glasses, so Burns gets an eyefull of Homer, shall we say, enjoying himself.
Serves the old man right…
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