March 26, 2023

Gabbing Geek

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Simpsons Did It!: “Bart Stops To Smell The Roosevelts”

In which Bart becomes a Theodore Roosevelt fanboy thanks to Superintendent Chalmers.

You know what supporting Simpsons character has been around for ages and never really gotten much of a focus before?

Well, probably a lot of them, but this time I am referring to Superintendent Chalmers.

Though the John Kricfalusi couch gag reminded me of why I never got into Ren and Stimpy.

That’s too weird and ugly for me.

At any rate, Springfield Elementary is having another fundraiser, a nautical-themed one to raise money due to being critically in debt.  During an auction, a mysterious woman with an English accent calls in and bids heavily on, oh, everything.  Skinner is a sucker for an English accent, so he never questions it until Bart strolls out to reveal he is the one who bid over $100K on stuff he clearly isn’t actually going to pay for.  Oh, Homer will if imaginary money from an invisible ATM counts as legal tender.  Since it doesn’t, the school got nothin’.

That brings the usual round of recriminations from Chalmers to Skinner, the only difference being Skinner has had enough.  Yes, Skinner’s shoulders are uneven, but that was a result of his time in a North Vietnam prison camp, and Chalmers never really asked about that.  As such, Skinner challenges Chalmers to take a personal hand in Bart’s education.  Chalmers agrees and privately freaks out since the last time he tried teaching, he went to teach the Breakfast Club only to learn their were really the Fight Club.

Chalmers’ plans go about as well as could be expected until he pulls out an American history book and asks Bart what he knows about Theodore Roosevelt.

As anyone knows, TR was America’s most badass president.  Take that, Andrew Jackson!

I say this by way of saying of course Bart was impressed.  A few web searches shows TR doing all kinds of badass things, like punching out what looks like Mr. Burns in a boxing match and having a hottie daughter.  Heck, the show got some actual TR recordings I didn’t know existed for Bart to listen to.  Bart’s hooked, and when the library closes, Chalmers can take Bart out horseback riding through a nearby park that was also created by Theodore Roosevelt.  Chalmers seems to believe real education is a lot more hand’s on, and being outdoors helps.  It certainly works on Bart.

It works so well he gets into an argument with Lisa over the merits of Theodore over Franklin.  I would have thought Lisa would have chosen Eleanor as her personal favorite Roosevelt, but there ya go.

Bart is so enamored, he convinces Milhouse, Nelson, Jimbo, and some other boys to come out camping with Chalmers in a park where supposedly TR lost a pair of spectacles (that’s a pair of glasses, Jimbo).  That trip goes well until Nelson finds the legendary lost spectacles and then falls down a ravine.  His mother sues the school district, and State Comptroller Atkins fires Chalmers.

So, what to do?  Bart and the other boys conspire to get Chalmers his job back by first tricking all the adults into leaving the school, then barricading themselves inside and not coming out until Chalmers is reinstated.

Does that work?  Only when Chief Wiggum drops his gun and kneecaps Comptroller Atkins.  The lawsuit against the police can counterbalance the lawsuit against the school, so Chalmers can have his job back with a title promotion to “Superduperintendent”.

That’s not a real word.

By the by, we’re also told the best movie or book for information on Theodore Roosevelt is one of the first two Night at the Museum movies.

That also can’t be right.

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