March 2, 2024

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A Series Of Unfortunate Events “The Wide Window: Part Two”

Season One, Episode Six

Lemony Snicket offers good advice in this episode: don’t put things that you are allergic to into your mouth, especially if you’re allergic to cats.

Aunt Josephine, the fiercest member of the family–allegedly–this punctuation would probably bother her a lot, may be dead.  Oh sure, Snicket told us last episode she wasn’t dead yet, but she sure does look dead now.

And the note she left behind says the Baudelaires are to be entrusted to the care of Captain Sham.  Now, the home audience and the Baudelaires are well aware that Captain Sham is Count Olaf because we aren’t stupid.  Other adults in the universe the Baudelaires inhabit?  No, of course not.  Mr. Poe with his bad cough doesn’t buy the Sham-is-Olaf theory one bit.  Heck, he doesn’t even remember that Olaf was also posing as Stephano back in the Reptile Room, and Poe was there when Olaf was unmasked like a more dangerous Scooby Doo villain.  That means its off to the Anxious Clown restaurant where a secret ally in the form of the waiter is trying to pass the kids help despite Olaf’s theater troop hiding in the kitchen threatening him.

As it is, the note is not as much of a forgery.  It actually is in Aunt Josephine’s handwriting.  But it’s also full of grammar errors, and Aunt Josephine would never do that sort of thing.  She sounds like someone I work with.

As it is, the Baudelaires pick up enough tips to take a peppermint each since they’re all allergic to the stuff and can slip out while Mr. Poe insists Sham/Olaf (sounds like a bad cleaning product) finish the adoption paperwork.

Why does a banker do all that anyway?

At any rate, the kids get back to the house before it falls into Lachrymose Lake (yes, that happens) and discover that the note was written by Aunt Josephine, but it’s in code.  Maybe she’s fierce after all!

I mean, she’s hiding out in a cave.  And the kids swipe a sailboat to find her despite a hurricane coming in, but they manage to survive that.  And it turns out Aunt Josephine faked her own death when Count Olaf revealed himself.  She was forced to write the note, but then did the whole death-faking-thing, and with a little courage from the orphans after the hurricane has passed, she agrees to return and straighten everything out.  She has something she wants to tell Olaf very badly.

First, though, they need to escape those lethal leeches that inhabit the lake and come out when someone has recently eaten.  Why did Aunt Josephine just have that banana?

Fortunately, the group is rescued.

Unfortunately, they were rescued by Olaf and his crew.

Fortunately, Aunt Josephine now has the courage to tell Olaf what she’s been holding in for a very long time.

And it was a grammar correction.

Cripes.

I think I do work with this person.

Unfortunately, Count Olaf takes the lesson to heart and using correct grammar manages to tell Aunt Josephine he’s going to feed her to the leeches.

So, yeah, now she’s dead.

But once back on shore, Mr. Poe is now willing to believe Captain Sham is Count Olaf.  Heck, it helps when Olaf basically announces it to Poe.  He’s not dumb enough to reject a complete personal confession from right in front of his face.

Of course, by now, everyone knows how effective Mr. Poe is.  The Baudelaires sneak away while he’s lecturing Olaf and Co.

Then Count Olaf and his crew sneak off while Poe is looking around for the Baudelaires.

Poe really sucks at this.

Well, maybe Violet, Klaus, and Sunny will have better luck at that lumber mill.

Yeah, I don’t think so either.