July 1, 2022

Gabbing Geek

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Simpsons Did It!: “Simpsons Bible Stories”

In which we get a rare Easter episode.

OK, let’s just talk about that ending, shall we?

So, the Simpson family are in church for a particularly hot Easter Sunday, and after Homer puts a chocolate bunny in the collection plate, Reverend Lovejoy responds by apparently reading the entire Bible.  One by one, the Simpsons fall asleep and dream of themselves as figures from the Bible.

So, yeah, Marge sees herself as Eve to Homer’s Adam in the Garden of Eden, and Lisa is advising Milhouse/Moses on how to lead the children of Israel out of Egypt when the adults of the school and the police department are the cruel Egyptians, Homer briefly dreams of himself as King Solomon getting all the pie, and Bart does this sequel to “David and Goliath” with a giant Nelson as Goliath II.  Bart’s is probably the least accurate to the source material since it repurposes everything as a cheesy action movie.

Now, normally, when I do these, I just do a plot summary and try to toss out whatever lines I thought were noteworthy during the course of the write-up.  But this episode ends with Judgement Day, and it’s not a dream or Jimmy’s favorite movie.  No, there go the Four Horsemen, the righteous (you know, the Flanders family) are being taken into Heaven, and fireballs are falling everywhere.  Now, clearly, this was not an in-continuity episode, because it ends with the entire Simpson family going to Hell.  Sure, Lisa had a chance to go to Heaven, but as she bodily rose, Homer yanked her back down for trying to go somewhere without his permission or something.

That’s, uh, wrong.

And sure, Homer going to Hell makes some sense.  The stairway into the flaming earth opens up and he smells barbecue.  Down he goes and his suffering begins because they are out of hot dogs and there’s pineapple in the coleslaw.  Did the rest of the family have to follow him?  Even if you accept the male Simpsons are hardly heavenly material, what about the women?

See, this episode threw me off because somehow the thought of the Simpsons all going to Hell was more disturbing to me than funny.

Good thing they’re back on Earth in the next one.

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