Jimmy Attempts To Read All Of Secret Wars 46 (Star-Lord and Kitty Edition)

Star-Lord and Kitty Pryde is a middle of the pack Secret Wars tie-in.  Currently ranked 22nd in our Power Rankings, it is not a bad read, but doesn’t do much to stand out.  What does make this series a bit unique is that the Star-Lord featured here is the actual, genuine, 100% original Star-Lord from the 616 Marvel Universe.  Outside of the main series, very few of the life raft survivors have appeared anywhere, let alone had their own series.  I’ll take a spoiler-y look at this series after the cut.

Be sure to check out our latest Secret Wars Power Rankings, which also features links to the other parts of my read through.

Star-Lord and Kitty Pryde #1

This series takes place after the events of Secret Wars #4, which sees Dr. Strange spread the surviving 616 and 1610 characters across Battleworld to protect them from Doom.  (Who, as God, can somehow not find them?)  I’m not sure how much time has passed between then and this issue, but it’s long enough for Star-Lord to become a regular attraction at The Quiet Room.   Which is the bar run by Black Bolt and featured in Inhumans: Attilan Rising.  So if it mattered, and it doesn’t seem to, this series (at least the first issue) takes place before Inhumans.

With Chris Pratt Star-Lord the new hot singer at The Quiet Room, he has all the women throwing themselves at him.  But he is not interested because he is still hung up on 616 Kitty Pryde, who is dead as fried chicken thanks to those pesky incursions.

The funny thing about Battleworld though is that there are umpteen versions of Kitty Pryde hanging around.  And when the one from the Age of Apocalypse domain strolls into the bar looking for all the Battleworld like Quinn’s lost love, he immediately falls head over heels for her.

Kitty is working for Valeria Von Doom, looking for anomalies from the “old worlds” that would be heretical to Doom.  When Gambit gets fresh during a meeting to examine a potential anomaly, Quinn steps in and in typical Star-Lord fashion makes a mess of things.  A scuffle ensues and Gambit escapes with the anomaly and the blades carved from the bones of Longshot that Kitty had brought to trade.  But when Kitty realizes Quinn himself is a living anomaly, she cuffs him and whisks him off to Doomgard.

Star-Lord and Kitty Pryde #2

This Kitty Pryde looks exactly like the Kitty that Peter Quinn was engaged to…except with claws and no love returned for Mr. Quinn.  When she tears through the New Mutdroids (a mostly robot version of the New Mutants) in search of Gambit, Quinn admits that he is also afraid of her.

Quinn explains his history and the truth about Doom to Kitty but she doesn’t believe him.  When he picks the restrains she placed him in and doesn’t bother to escape, she does begin to trust him.  Quinn questions Kitty on why she just doesn’t call in back up to deal with him and Gambit and she reveals that her mission is top secret.  Even from the Thors.  She is alone out here.

Kitty tells Quinn that he is free to go in thanks for saving her from the exploding New Mutdroids, but he decides to stick around and help her catch Gambit.  The two trace Gambit to the Doomehneim Museum where they find the anomaly that Gambit had brought to trade.  Or so they thought.  It is a decoy and Star-Lord and Kitty have fallen into the oldest trap in the book.

Star-Lord and Kitty Pryde #3

Here’s the predicament: 616 Peter Quinn, aka Star-Lord and Age of Apocalypse domain Kitty Pryde have been captured by Gambit.  They are being restrained by a small robot named Widget who is a Kitty Pryde from another domain.  As such, Kitty’s powers don’t work against it and she cannot phase herself and Quinn out of its clutches.

Quinn has another plan.  Since Widget is a Kitty, Quinn sings the robot his Kitty’s favorite song…and the robot instantly falls in love with him and frees them.  O…k…

Still, they have to escape from Gambit, which isn’t looking good with his Longshot blades that seem to have the former X-Man’s renowned luck powers.  That is until Doom himself shows up and knocks Gambit out.  But it only appears to be Doom, and is in fact a very, very much happier version of Drax than the 616 has ever seen.  The trio escape and the Thors show up to try to take Gambit away, but that is a story never to be told.  I only note it because Beta Ray Thor is here, so this series has to take place before Thors.  Does that make sense?  Who knows anymore.

Quinn and Kitty part with a kiss and Peter and Drax head out to find adventure on Battleworld.  Will 99.9% of this be ignored in the main series…probably.