We here at Gabbing Geek LOVE box office reports. Ok….JUST me and Ryan. Everyone else seems to hate them. We’ve talked a lot about it the last few weeks, so let’s look at the winners and losers of this year’s box office as we wait for the Martian to officially kick off the Fall movie season.
GROSS: $350M ($736M TOTAL)
WHY IT POPPED? Because it was excellent. It was an Academy Award caliber drama with brilliant animation. So glad to see this movie shine.
GROSS: $47M ($183M TOTAL)
WHY IT POOPED? The Wachowskis have lost it. They make beautiful moving pictures that should never be called movies. They should switch careers and make music videos. (Do they still MAKE music videos?)
GROSS: $351M ($1.5B TOTAL)
WHY IT POPPED? I don’t know. People like dumb stuff and want to see explosions? This is a Transformers 4 mystery to me. I can see it being popular, but I am floored it is currently the 5th highest grossing global film in history.
GROSS: $55M ($156M TOTAL)
WHY IT POOPED? People didn’t just dislike the film. They really seemed to hate the people involved as well. Vitriol like this is a once in a generation experience saved for films like Ishtar and Battlefield: Earth.
STRAIGHT OUTTA COMPTON
GROSS: $152M ($171M TOTAL)
WHY IT POPPED? Because it was a smart, well made movie about the 90s that reflected back many events that are still happening today.
GROSS: $93M ($208M TOTAL)
WHY IT POOPED? I don’t get why this one bombed. I thought it was fun but it did not connect with folks.
GROSS: $330M ($1.05B TOTAL)
WHY IT POPPED? Because it was not a challenging film. Even with a dull as dirt story, the minions are fun characters. I gave the film a weak review, but I still smile looking at the picture of them above.
GROSS: $17M ($110M TOTAL)
WHY IT POOPED? It was late coming out, dumped in very early January, and was incoherently dumb. And Jeff Bridges sound like he had eleven marbles in his mouth the whole time (three more than usual). Not a good combination for a hit.
PITCH PERFECT 2
GROSS: $183M ($285M TOTAL)
WHY IT POPPED? People like the music. This one was a typical comedy sequel that offered nothing new except different songs. Recycled jokes don’t get you very far. Throw in an entire new soundtrack, and you have a chance to pop.
MAN FROM U.N.C.L.E.
GROSS: $41M ($89M TOTAL) Still in Theaters
WHY IT POOPED? I wish this one had done better. It was a fun little movie. August is still a burial ground. 2014 was an anomaly.
GROSS: $649M ($1.65B TOTAL)
WHY IT POPPED? Because the universe knew Ryan would be furious. That is enough for me.
GROSS: $7.7M ($30.4 TOTAL)
WHY IT POOPED? It was one of the worst movies I have ever seen. Johnny Depp famously played Ed Wood, the worst director ever. Even Ed Wood would have said this movie was crap.
WINNER BUT A DISAPPOINTMENT
AVENGERS: AGE OF ULTRON
GROSS: $458.6M ($1.4B TOTAL)
WHY IT POPPED? It’s the #6 movie of all time and it is a slight disappointment? Why? Because it is the sequel to the #4 movie all time and some of us were predicting it would surpass all other films and overtake Avatar for #1. Instead, we got a mediocre offering that might have weakened Marvel’s hold on the box office dominance.
LOSER IF NOT FOR CHINA
GROSS:$89.7M ($440M TOTAL)
WHY IT POOPED? American audiences largely rejected it, but Auh-nuld’s global stardom reached the shores of China and made enough to warrant a sequel.
Noteworthy Issues: Dark Knights Of Steel: Tales From The Three Kingdoms #1 (September, 2022)
2023 Year Of Anticipation
Watson Ranks the Top Movies/Specials of 2022: Original Properties Reigned, Tentpoles Were Folded