Aziraphale and Crowley really like the Earth. But their superiors, well, neither side seems to much care. Gabriel is wandering into Aziraphale’s book shop, claiming to buy pornography. Instead, he wants war. Crowley’s bosses interrupt a talk show to say the same thing. Can an angel and a demon possibly stop the end of everything when they lost the Antichrist?
As it is, the two have a plan now: find out who else was born in the hospital that night when the Antichrist was lost. OK, so, the hospital has since been converted into a paintball range for corporate retreats. And yes, Crowley does change all the guns into real guns, but nobody gets hurt. Arrested, sure, but not hurt. Fortunately, they get a name. But what Aziraphale really wants is a book.
Specifically, he wants a copy Anges Nutter’s a book of prophecy. She was the last witch to be burned at the stake. The thing is, she was really good at predicting things. That would be why she packed her pockets with gunpowder and roofing nails. Agnes left her book to her descendants. And all the predictions in there came true, leading to her many times great granddaughter Anathema to know she has a mission.
Anathema has to stop the apocalypse.
Oh, the witchfinder who burned Agnes and died in the process also has a many times great grandson named Newton Pulsifer. He’s bad with computers, but just got a new job as an official member of the Witchfinder Army.
Now, it should be worth noting Anathema did find the Antichrist. But Adam is a good kid with a sweet dog named Dog. And even when he plays witchfinder with his friends, well, they weren’t really hurting anybody. About the worst you can say about the kid is he sneaks Dog into his room at night. Point is, Anathema didn’t realize who the kid is.
She did get a little suspicious when Crowley hit her with his car. Not so much about Crowley, but about Aziraphale. He brings in some light, heals her injuries, and repairs her bicycle. You know, without really touching anything. He even temporarily gives her a better bike.
She also left Agnes’ book in the back of Crowley’s car. And Aziraphale finds it. The first prophecy he reads predicts his cocoa is cold while he reads the book. That is correct.
But the human race only has a few days left until the end. The Horsemen are gathering. An independent contractor is delivering their equipment. First up is War. She’s a war correspondent whose presence causes more death and destruction than she covers. Her sword arrives just as a peace signing ceremony goes wrong over the order of who signs the document. Lots of death there.
You know, the end doesn’t seem like much fun. Good thing this show is so far.