The Umbrella Academy “Man On The Moon”

Man, don’t mess with Klaus.

Yes, Klaus has been captured by Hazel and Cha-Cha, and he’s not a good hostage.  For one thing, he (accurately) predicts the rest of the family won’t miss him, and he doesn’t really know anything (mostly true there).  Strangling him turns him on because apparently he’s into autoerotic asphyxiation.  Waterboarding means he takes a drink.  Slapping him does other things, but take his drugs away?  He’ll mention Number Five was interested in a prosthetic eye, sending the two killers to the factory and burning it down.  That sends a panic into Five who hides in the library with his manikin girlfriend.

Luther and Diego find him there.

By the by, Luther was the last to leave Sir Reginald’s house.  He was badly injured on a mission, so the abusive asshat he called “dad” injected Luther with something that made his torso part-ape.

And while Alison goes to check on Vanya, she finds Leonard in her apartment.  He says he was just using the bathroom.  Alison knows a thing or six about stalkers, but Vanya never really got any kind of attention from anyone before, so she blows off Alison’s advice.

But here’s the thing:  even with Luther and Diego working together again, that doesn’t mean much when Diego isn’t sharing things like who really turned Grace off, and they do need Pogo telling them off to do that much working together (and the fact Luther continually gets stuck in doorways is a nice running gag).

And then Klaus, well, maybe saves himself.  Sort of.  See, as he sobers up and we see why his childhood sucked, he starts to see more and more ghosts beyond his brother Ben who’re trying to be helpful (I think).  Who are these ghosts?  All of Hazel and Cha-Cha’s victims.  Oh, and Hazel doesn’t have as many as Cha-Cha thought because he sometimes lets people go.

Of course, the arson got on the radar on Diego’s cop ex-girlfriend Eudora.  She manages to find the motel the two killers are staying at.  She does leave a message for Diego to find her, but he takes too long to get home, she goes in alone, unties Klaus…and ends up getting killed by Cha-Cha.  Klaus, meanwhile, manages to escape with a briefcase of theirs.  What’s in there?  Apparently time travel stuff because Klaus literally disappears while on a bus.

And then Diego finds the deceased Eudora.  He might have gotten there sooner but, you know, he and Luther didn’t notice Klaus was missing until they were told their brother was missing and he was the only one unaccounted for.

Klaus needs help.

tomk74

Defender of the faith, contributing writer, debonair man-about-town.

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