Gabbing Geek Ranks the Franchises

When the news that the Chris Pine Star Trek films were dead, the Gabbing Geek bullpen erupted in talks of the fate of the franchise.  We started talking about what was next.  What would happen.  How would Trek stay relevant with just streaming series to keep it afloat.

One thing led to another and then we found ourselves ranking geek franchises in an epic LIST OF TRUTH!  Movies.  TV. Comics.  Toys.  Video Games.  Home pregnancy tests.  Everything was considered in the rankings.  Our ballot was originally 20 franchises, to be easy, but I realized I forgot Indiana Jones so we updated to 21.

True to form, we argued about the ones NOT on the list, but did come to a consensus on a definitive Gabbing Geek ranking of Geek Media Franchises!

Here we go!  To rank the properties, Gabbing Geek contributors,  Watson (that’s me!), Ryan, Jenny, Tom, Greg, #@$%-ing JIMMY!, Jonathan, and Halbrook all scored them 1st through 21st.  A first place vote got the franchise one point.  Tenth place give it ten points.  Last place gave the property 21 points.  Then we compiled the total score.

So the rankings are like golf… you want the lowest score possible.

How did they rank?

In a League of Their Own

1 . Marvel (Regardless of Studio) – 14 points

What We Thought: If you had told us fifteen years ago that Marvel movies without the X-Men, Fantastic Four, and, for several years, Spider-Man, would be the hottest cinematic franchise ever, we would have called you nuts.  In addition to the MCU and other studios’ films, Marvel’s comics and media have captured the public’s attention, as well as the Geeks’.  Of the eight ballots, Marvel took five first place votes and two second place votes. Only Tom voted lower, ranking Marvel #5.  Tom sucks.

2 . Star Wars – 17 points

What We Thought: Not far off from Marvel, the grandfather of all franchises scores very high.  40 years of movies, comics, toys, and bed sheets really hold a lot of weight with the Geeks.  Tom and Halbrook ranked it first, but no one ranked this one lower than third.  No one is ready to give up on Star Wars  just yet, even after Solo.

Beloved Franchises

3 . Classic Disney & Pixar – 58 points

What We Thought: We had a mini-riot in the Gabbing Geek bullpen about why these two where combined.  Jenny called me the worst.  Jimmy insulted the mother of the screenwriter of Clue.  Jonathan even called me the “Bohemian Rhapsody of list makers.”  But we rallied and ranked them together anyway.  Oddly, in a shifting of Disney’s 21st century appeal, Pixar was the property the Geeks liked way more than the Mouse.

4 . Star Trek – 61 points

What We Thought: Star Trek has been through multiple generations, reboots, TV, cartoons, comics, books, movies.  It has been in circulation consistently since the 1960s Original Series and still holds high esteem in the Geek bullpen.  This high of a ranking, though, is driven largely by geek love from two voters: Ryan gave it 2nd and Halbrook gave it 3rd.

5 . Indiana Jones – 62 points

What We Thought: Indiana Jones has a moderate media empire, but clearly the first three of the four movies bolster the franchise’s popularity.  Everyone voted this one in their top ten, but it did feel like Kingdom of the Crystal Skull pulled the franchise down a bit.  This franchise might need to do something powerful soon, or the value of the man in the hat might continue to decline.

6 . Harry Potter – 63 points

What We Thought: Some of the best selling books of all-time.  Some of the most successful movies of all time. Pottermore fandom.  The amazing theme park attractions in Universal studio.  This is a most modern of the SUPER franchises and fares quite well with the geeks.  No one mentioned the Fantastic Beasts spinoffs, and maybe that is a good thing.  The Newman family seemed to like it the most, but no one really rated this one poorly.

7 . DC – 63 points

What We Thought: A franchise that created superheroes, DC used to be THE dominant Superhero film clearinghouse.  The Reeve Superman, Burton Batman, Nolan Dark Knight? They were riding high!  But it feels like the DCEU… and the fact that many of the Gabbing Geek voters are wussy Marvel Zombies… drops DC a bit lower.  Like Star Trek, this one is bolstered by two super fans:  Watson ranked it first and Tom went with 3rd.  Tom still sucks, but he is right this time.

8 . Lord of the Rings – 64 points

What We Thought: Obviously, this started with the Tolkien book series, and then really caught fire with the Oscar winning Peter Jackson trilogy.  His Hobbit trilogy should have been one movie, and I think that might have dropped this one down from where it would have been without those films.  Greg and Ryan were not fans, ranking it fairly low.

9 . Game of Thrones – 64 points

What We Thought: You can call it a book series, but no one thinks of the books anymore.  The TV show has taken over the emotional oxygen of this franchise.  The show is still going, and needs to prove its franchise status with the planned spinoffs, but right now there are very few things that excite us more than the final season this Spring.  This would have been higher, but Greg F has never seen it and gave it a dead last rating.  Tom sucks.

Solid Franchises

10 . Terminator – 87 points

What We Thought: This is a fairly enduring franchise that will be tested this winter with Terminator 2.5, a new installment ignoring all the movies that were made after the 1991 James Cameron classic.  Jimmy’s #4 bolstered this one, but several others of us seemed to be asking, “If the franchise is so good, why do they need to ignore most of its content to reboot?”

11 . Loony Tunes – 94 points

What We Thought: How many people learned some of the more classical opera music because Bugs Bunny was trolling a douchy tenor?  Was it Duck Season or Rabbit Seasons?  This cartoon was a classic, and its movies, books, and toys have been part of childhoods for 50+ years.  Tom and Greg loved it, but Jenny essentially called this the “Beatles of geek properties”… and somehow that was an insult in Jennyland.

12 . James Bond – 99 points

Related image

What We Thought: So many people have put on the tuxedo over the years, and the franchise has flourished. One of the best video games ever came with a license to kill for the Nintendo 64.  What will happen after Daniel Craig transitions the role after his next film?  The FGeeks will be there to find out, but no one is going to a Bond convention, it seems.

13 . Transformers – 106 points

What We Thought: We like the toys. We like the comics.  We like the cartoon.  We LOVED the song “The Touch”.  All excellent.  The movies leave a lot to be desired.  Maybe the quality of Bumblebee will turn that around?  Time will tell.

14 . Aliens – 111 points

What We Thought: Largely a film and comic franchise, Aliens kind of hit the middle of the pack.  No one seemed to love it but no one hated it.  We do give Ripley some mad props for being a badass female Geek icon.

15 . GI Joe – 113 points

What We Thought: The toys were a huge hit in the 80s.  Many guys in their mid-40s came into monthly comics because of the Larry Hama adaptation.  The movies REALLY stunk though, and that came up a LOT in our debates.  Those of us who like that tried to avoid that part of the franchise.

No Love Franchises

16 . Predator – 118 points

What We Thought: Like it’s sister series, Aliens, this one is largely movies and comics.  I am not sure anyone really hates the Predator franchise, but it is definitely an also ran.  The difference between Predator and Aliens is the latter franchise’s third best director was David Fincher.  Predator’s BEST was Shane Black…or maybe John McTiernan.  Tough compare.

17 . Battlestar Galactica – 120 points

Image result for battlestar galactica

What We Thought: Obviously this originated as a Star Wars TV knockoff, but really gained Geek cred with the SciFi TV series in the early 21st century.  Ryan liked it most of all (#6), but it also suffered from some folks having never seen it.

18 . Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles – 121 points

What We Thought: Heroes on the half shell?  These turtles were powered down by the Geeks.  What started as a black and white indie comic, spawned movies, cartoons, toys, and video games.  No one really talked about this one much either way; with only Jonathan ranking it in his top ten.

19 . Fast and the Furious – 129 points

What We Thought: I honestly included this to troll Ryan.  Even with his #5 vote, this one plummeted to the bottom franchises.  Maybe the Hobbes & Shaw spinoff will save the franchise…even as it starves Ludacris’ family…

20 . Jurassic Park – 135 points

What We Thought: Long gone are the Steven Spielberg memories.  Instead we see Bryce Dallas Howard running around in high heels.  No one loved it, but many man did Ryan and Halbrook hate it; rating it dead last.

Only Jenny Likes Pokemon

21 . Pokemon – 149 points

What We Thought: This one OWNED the bottom of the list like no other Geek properties.  Maybe Detective Pikachu will change that, but right now this property is in a crappy league of its own.  Jenny gave it a #10 rating, but everyone else laughed at her. A lot.  Like, some of us texted her to laugh at her in a different forum.  The next highest rating was Jonathan with a paltry 17… and we suspect it is because he loves Jenny…

That’s the list and it is the TRUTH!  What do you think?  How would you rank these properties?  Let us know!  In the meantime, here is how each voter ranked the full list.  Enjoy!

Full Ballot by Voter

Rank Property Watson Tom Greg Jimmy Jonathan Ryan Jenny Halbrook
1 Marvel (Regardless of Studio) 2 5 1 1 1 1 1 2
2 Star Wars 3 1 3 2 2 3 2 1
3 Classic Disney and Pixar 6 17 2 5 13 4 5 6
4 Star Trek 11 6 9 7 14 2 9 3
5 Indiana Jones 5 9 8 8 9 7 6 10
6 Harry Potter 10 8 12 9 4 12 3 5
7 DC 1 3 10 13 6 9 8 13
8 Lord of the Rings 8 7 16 6 5 14 4 4
9 Game of Thrones 4 4 21 3 3 10 7 12
10 Terminator 13 11 11 4 7 17 15 9
11 Looney Tunes 7 2 4 15 18 18 19 11
12 James Bond 16 13 5 16 10 8 17 14
13 Transformers 15 16 6 19 15 15 13 7
14 Aliens 18 15 13 12 12 13 12 16
15 GI Joe 9 18 7 18 16 19 18 8
16 Predator 14 12 15 17 11 16 16 17
17 Battlestar Galactica 19 10 18 11 21 6 20 15
18 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 17 19 14 20 8 11 14 18
19 Fast and the Furious 20 14 20 10 20 5 21 19
20 Jurassic Park 12 20 17 14 19 21 11 21
21 Pokemon 21 21 19 21 17 20 10 20

3 thoughts on “Gabbing Geek Ranks the Franchises

  1. You’re goddamn right I ranked Marvel at 5. You said it was judging from total product. That means more than just the MCU. It means shitty comics in the 90s, half-assed animated series on the Disney Channel, and the Inhumans live action TV series. I’ve always preferred DC to Marvel and, quite frankly, I would stack the DC Animated Universe against the MCU in terms of long term, in depth, totally fun superhero storytelling. Follow your own instructions!

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: