Simpsons Did It!: “Frink Gets Testy”

There’s a quick joke in this one where Homer and Marge exchange a worried glance when an apocalyptic “documentary” mentions America electing the Antichrist president.

This episode aired in January of 2018.  Just sayin’.

Why were the Simpsons watching such silly stuff?  Well, it was a movie hosted by the late Orson Welles (played, as always, by the very much alive Maurice LaMarche) about Nostradamus, making claims about the end times.  The Simpsons laugh it all off, wondering who would be foolish enough to believe it.

That turns out to be Mr. Burns.

I did not see that coming.

Anyhoo, Burns wants to build an Ark to get himself away, and he wants to have the best and the brightest Springfield has to offer to go with him as his personal slaves.  He enlists the local branch of Mensa to figure out who those people might be, and it looks like Mensa expanded its membership to include Sideshow Mel and Manjula, but Skinner and Lisa are missing.  They collectively just want to make it based on IQ tests (they’ve already passed), but then in comes Professor Frink to point out that IQ tests are questionable and he has a better one that measures the whole worth of a person.  He convinces them through song  and then wonders how they can get the whole town to take the test.

Answer:  Burns will make everyone in town take the test, using the police to round people up.  The results are announced on the news, and Lisa is pleased to see she got a very high score out of a possible 500.  But Ralph Wiggum somehow got one point higher.

Marge did well, Homer scored above the halfway point, and Bart got…one point.

Just one?


Bart doesn’t mind.

Marge does.  A trip to Frink’s reveals the “B Simpson” who got the one was actually an “H Simpson”.  Homer scroed the 1 point, and now he feels bad and everyone in town treats him like he’s stupid.  Moreso than usual.  He keeps doing stupid things too which doesn’t help.

Lisa, meanwhile, is obsessing over Ralph.  How did a kid who wanders into an active construction site and thinks his father might actually be inside the phone when he calls home do better?

How does it all turn out?  Well, Lisa gets a bonus ten points for pointing out a flaw in the test.  Marge teaches Homer how to write in cursive and he’s soon writing romantic poetry declaring Marge as beautiful as her sisters are hideous.  And Burns finishes his Ark, gets his chosen people onboard, and explains they’re going to be his slaves.

No one wants to be a slave and they all get off.  Then the Ark takes off without them, even leaving Smithers behind since he went back for the old man’s slippers.

We end the episode with Burns being strangled by a robot.

Some people never learn.

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