I’ve probably said this before, and I will certainly say it again, but as much as the different members of the Simpsons family may fight, they deep down do love and care about each other. Bart’s not that bad a kid compared to many. He just has a rambunctious side that likes to pull pranks. He’s not evil. He does care about Lisa. That was all really hammered home in the awful Family Guy crossover I will not be writing about where the Griffins, who really do seem to hate each other at times and are much more legitimately awful people, really show what a bad family looks like.
Point is, Bart does something bad to Lisa here and feels bad about it.
Yes, it seems the beach is safe to swim at again, not because of environmental clean-up but because the city lowered its safety standards, so the Simpsons head to the shore. While there, Bart buys a temporary tattoo that isn’t as waterproof as he’d hoped and Lisa buys a hat. She names the hat “Sunny” and loves it for…reasons.
Meanwhile, we learn Homer is a chess prodigy because of something that happened in his youth. More on that later.
See, Bart is feeling jealous about Lisa and her hat that she loves for…reasons, so he tosses it out the window into a nearby dump when Homer stops at a drive-in for dinner and Lisa is asleep. Lisa wakes up the next morning to find Sunny, the hat she loves for…reasons, to be missing. She rouses her parents and causes Homer to panic until he remembers the baby’s name is Maggie. Lisa can’t even get a replacement hat because the store is all out.
Bart, meanwhile, is visited by a disgusting green version of himself voiced by Patton Oswalt that grows over time. What is it? Bart’s guilt. Eventually, Bart tells Lisa what happened to the hat, but she gets angry. Then he goes down to the dump and finds the hat inside an old car that gets cubed before his eyes (Gil was living in that car!). With some prayerful help from Rod and Tod, Bart is able to dissolve the cube in a cola drink and retrieve the hat, dirty and roughed up but otherwise fine.
What was Homer doing during all this asked nobody at all? Well, he was a chess prodigy because after Mona left him and Grampa, the two played chess. But Grampa kept beating Homer and then gloating. Homer went to a chess instructor for lessons, the instructor saying Homer reminded the old teacher of his own son…who was sitting in the next room playing with a Rubik’s Cube. As such, Homer could now beat Grampa, but Grampa didn’t want to play anymore, so Homer stopped playing himself. Marge arranged some therapy from Norwegian chess champion and guest star Magnus Carlsen (who may or may not be related to Homer’s coworker Carl). Homer realizes he needs to see how he feels about Grampa by playing the old man at chess. Homer ends up letting Grampa win, so he doesn’t hate his father.
But then we learn Lisa doesn’t really hate Bart either because she gets back Sunny, the hat she loves for…reasons, and after her own guilt monster shows up, she forgives Bart. Bart’s guilt monster floats off, shrinking as it goes, hits an airplane, and then lands in a cooling tower for the Power Plant where Mr. Burns can see it. Maybe because now it’s a giant monster again.
Homer, meanwhile, realizes he missed something and doesn’t mind, so his own guilt monster shows up to torment him, but Homer tells it to get in line with the other demons that haunt him. There are a lot of them.
Oh, and there was a Robot Chicken couch gag complete with a guest appearance by Seth Green.
I think that’s enough of that.
And we shall never speak of Lisa’s hat again despite the fact she loves it for…reasons.