One Week!

With much love and respect to the Barenaked Ladies.

It’s just one week to Infinity
War comes out and we all get to see
All our favorite heroes see a threat and they start
To fight together then they get ripped apart
Just a few days until we will mourn
All the deaths until MCU is reborn
Afterwards we all will see
That nobody is going live through Infinity

Hold it now and watch Thor wink
As I make you stop, think
At least we won’t be watching Aquaman
We’ll see Thanos face up with Rocket
Blow him up and put pieces in his pocket
Rip Groot apart and turn him into a ceiling fan
He’ll kill Gamora on his home moon
Choke Star Lord on his own Zune
Stab Drax through his sensitive nipples
Tie Mantis in a head knot
Kill the Milano with one shot
And feed Yondu’s corpse to seagulls
Gonna ‘port to Earth ‘cuz the Stones are worth
Making an entrance that isn’t full of mirth
And Thanos isn’t one to make a jokey
So he’ll grab the Tesseract and make a pact
Which he’ll ignore ‘cuz he has no tact
Reach out one hand and crush the skull of Loki

How can I help it if I think everyone is gonna die?
If I told you someone would live that’d be a lie
I’m the kind of guy who expects a massive funeral
Don’t believe I’m right? Well, you soon will
Thanos has a tendency to kill everyone he meets
And he has a history of wearing purple shirts

It’s just one week to Infinity
A movie so long you’ll have to hold your pee
Dark rooms full of gasps and cries
This is one war that won’t end in a tie
Last words we hear through all the noise
At least this movie will give us cool toys
Yesterday you probably didn’t think
That this movie will be darker than india ink

Flicking that foul in, Thanos is fowlin’
Killing everyone with the fans all howlin’
Howard will be ducked, The Collector is fucked
Nova corp is a corncob to be shucked
Black Widow gets confronted
The Falcon get hunted
When Cap dies he’ll bleed white, blue, and red
Bucky gets the other disarmed
Scarlet Witch will be harmed
And Vision gets the stone ripped out his head
Gotta get a box of big tissues
Cuz all of them I’m gonna use
When Thanos rips out Doc Strange’s brain
Wakanda may become barren
But T’Challa says “Aw hell nah, Karen!”
And moves everyone to the Astral Plane

How can I help it if I think everyone is gonna die?
We all know the movie will make Jenny cry
I’m the kind of guy who wants to make a deathpool
And I think Spidey will die even if I am a fool
I have a tendency to leave Avengers feeling mad
I have a history of losing my shit

It’s just one week to Infinty
After this movie who will the Avengers be?
Seven days till we get to learn
Will the MCU live or is it gonna burn?
A few days till we learn Avengers 4’s name
But they won’t live forever just like in Fame
Yesterday you thought the movie was just ahead
But now you’re gonna have this song stuck in your head

Gonna have this song stuck in your head
Gonna have this song stuck in your head
Ant-Man still dies his movie’s a prequel instead


Gabbing Geek co-founder, podcaster

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