Here we are again. Another Halloween episode I won’t know what to say much about. This one came out in 2012 and opens with a Mayan calendar bit where the ancient Mayans could prevent the end of the world if they just made the right human sacrifice. That would be a Mayan Homer. Instead, Mayan Marge tricked Mayan Moe to go instead, and then in the present, Mayan gods show up and destroy the Earth, starting with the Simpson house. Heck, they almost hit Kang and Kodos doing a flyby.
The Mayans figured the exact date out way back when and were fine with it. They knew even then that people would blame Barack Obama for it.
So, what are our stories for this year? Well, the city of Springfield built a super-collider that was too small to determine anything meaningful but big enough to make a black hole. Lisa finds the thing and realizes its dangerous, particularly after it sucks up everything around it, including a tumbling Ralph Wiggum and a bike jumping Nelson. Neither seemed that upset, so Lisa took it home and told the rest of her family not to let anything get sucked into the black hole because feeding it would only make it stronger.
I’m not sure that’s how it works.
Of course, the Simpsons ignore Lisa’s advice. Even the dog looks guilty when Marge asks what happened to the cat. Heck, Homer starts a junk removal business. When the Simpson house goes, Lisa points out just ONE MORE THING will be a point of no return.
That would be when Milhouse finally hit a home run for his Little League team. Everyone in Springfield gets sucked into the hole except for Maggie. She loses her pacifier which, well, pacifies the black hole and it flies off into space.
Don’t feel too bad for everybody else, though. Springfield landed in another dimension where aliens love human junk. Heck, even Ralph, Nelson, and Snowball II are fine.
Next up we get a Paranormal Activity parody where something is causing problems in the Simpson house. It seems Marge once made a deal with the devil to stop him from killing her sisters when Patty and Selma summoned Satan due to being bored one day. All little Marge had to do was give up her favorite child thirty years later. That would be Maggie. Or Lisa. It isn’t Bart. The devil also looks like Moe, but Homer asks if anything else will do and the devil says a threesome with himself, Homer, and another demon.
That demon sure shouted the safe word pretty quick when Homer wanted to get experimental.
Finally, there’s a parody of that super-scary movie Back to the Future. Just roll with it.
See, Bart wants a rare comic book, and Comic Book Guy points out the thing only cost a quarter in 1974. If Bart had a time machine…oh, wait, Professor Frink built one out of a car and tosses Bart the keys while he takes a break. Bart then goes back in time, reads the comic (it was bland), and then…sees Homer getting detention in high school, just like in “The Way We Was”. Feeling the need to taunt his old man when he was a young man, Bart provokes the sort of reaction adult Homer has so many times, but when Marge walks in it turns out a guy strangling a small boy is one of her turn-offs. She’ll never date Homer now. Does Bart cease to exist? Er, no. In fact, his life got better. When he returns to the present, he sees his father is Artie Ziff (returning guest star Jon Lovitz), and stowaway teenage Homer soon joins forces with adult Homer, and they have a time machine, so they gather Homers from all kinds of timelines. Challenging Artie to a fight with a small army seems like the way to go, but Artie is a master of a Brazilian martial art, and he and Bartie Ziff beat up the Homers. But then Marge realizes she loved them and leaves Artie.
Egyptian Slave Homer has to do all the chores.
That was weird.