Simpsons Did It!: “Loan-A-Lisa”

Even Grampa Simpson believes Marge is incapable of having fun.  That can’t be good.

But how did Grampa come to that conclusion?  Well, Grampa decided to give his family their inheritance from a lifetime of his saving and investments, which came out to about $50 each.

Man, I coulda swore Grampa gave the other Simpsons their inheritance before

Well, what does the family do with the money?  Bart pays Gil $50 to walk up the down escalator all day.  And that’s all that Bart does for pretty much the entire episode.

Homer rents a carpet cleaner.  The cat gets stuck inside.

Marge goes to buy an expensive handbag, not realizing the tag was bent to read $500 instead of $50.  She would turn it down, but mockery from the likes of Helen Lovejoy and Julio convince her to follow through.  She can return it the next day, but first Homer will take her out to enjoy it.  If she weren’t afraid of spilling anything on the bag at Springfield’s best restaurant, that might work.  And even when Homer gets a dab of cocktail sauce on it, she still is able to get the full refund.

That gives Homer an idea where he buys stuff and then returns it the next day to use nice things for free.  He gets caught by guest star Chris Hansen and a camera crew, and judging by whom Hansen usually catches, Homer got off lucky.  Not that he’d ever do that, but this is Homer and he does all kinds of stupid things accidentally.

But what about Lisa?  She wants to invest her money into a charity and learns about microfinancing from a website that includes Nobel-prize winning guest star Muhammad Yunus giving some pointers on loaning small amounts of money so poor people can achieve their business dreams.  You know, I think Watson met that guy once…

As it is, Lisa soon realizes that there’s someone in East Springfield looking for a small loan.  Yes, Nelson has a bike detailing business he’d like to set up.  He just needs $50.  Lisa decides to loan the money to him.  Will that lead to them getting back together?  Oh God, I hope not…

As it is, with the $50, Nelson is able to get his business off the ground, and he’s doing a good job of it.  He’s able to hire people!  And he thinks he can, er, quit school.  Lisa is shocked and horrified!  Nelson, on the other hand, is mostly shocked Lisa is lsimpson_jazzgirl.  Sure, Lisa can ask Principal Skinner to intervene, but bullying is down, and Nelson is paying $11 and hour, which is nightwatchman money.  Both Skinner and Chalmers want in on that.

Lisa even tries to convince Nelson to stay in school by taking him to an entrepreneurs expo, where Lisa is horrified to learn guest star Mark Zuckerberg dropped out of school.  So did the strangely silent Bill Gates and Richard Branson.  Sure, there is someone there who stayed in school.  He’s the janitor.  Nelson will not be taking his advice.

Dejected, Lisa goes home and has dinner with the family.  Grampa is visiting and asked what the family did with their money.  Marge, Grampa declares, is no fun.  But we knew that from the top of this write-up.  As for Lisa, he suggests that giving people money doesn’t mean they change into better people.

Taking this to heart, Lisa  goes to see Nelson the next day only to find he’s under siege from angry customers.  It seems the epoxy he was using was water soluble.  More schooling would be of some help.  He gives the original $50 to his employee Skinner to put towards the school, and uses the last of his money to take Lisa skating.  They hold hands and knock people over, including Mark Zuckerberg.  Lisa keeps apologizing.

But they are not back together.  Probably.

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