Simpsons Did It!: “The Squirt And The Whale”

Lisa Simpson has long had life batter her down.  She’s too smart and moral for most of the town she calls home.

Maybe she should try to save a whale.

But first, Homer’s upset about the high electric bill.  Sure, the family has every possible electrical appliance plugged in at once, including a movie projector that’s just spinning around and a ton of Christmas lights.  But then Lisa suggests an alternate energy expo, and Homer loves expos, so off the family goes.

Once there, Homer finds he likes a wind turbine.  It seems to work so well the house is giving electricity back to the power company.  Figuring he doesn’t need to stay on the grid anymore, Homer goes off the grid.  Why did Lenny take his call?  Oh well.  That plan works until it is generally pointed out he’d need to stay on the grid to keep the house running full time, but this being Homer, he’s too proud to go back on the grid.  As such, the house keeps losing power as the wind dies down.  Then the wind picks up.  I mean it really picks up.  Huge wind storm.  Now the house as too much electricity, but considering the turbine has collapsed in the next scene, we can stop worrying about that.

No, the wind also blew a blue whale onto a nearby beach, and Lisa finds her.  Dubbing the whale Bluella, Lisa decides to save this whale.  Why the blue whale is singing humpback whale song I don’t know, but there you go.  Marge convinces Homer to help.  Homer first recruits all the strongest men in town to push the whale back into the sea.  They aren’t that strong.  They he gets the smartest men in town.  They play head-tethered tug-o-war with the strongest men.  That doesn’t help anybody.  The smartest men in Springfield may not be that smart.  Then Homer tries to pull the whale off the beach with a few tugboats.  That just tugs the ends off the boats.

Lisa, upset, falls asleep next to Bluella.  She awakens to find some Marines carrying the whale out to sea.  You know, if the whale didn’t start swimming through the stars, that might have been nice.  Instead, Lisa was dreaming, and she wakes up to find Bluella has died.

Now, to Homer’s credit, he does try to comfort Lisa with the sad news that parents aren’t perfect.  Bart of course knew that, but did Homer have to address his son as an accident?  And sure, Bart and Milhouse plan to poke the dead whale with a stick, but when they get there, Chief Wiggum is planning on dynamiting it.  That’s a horrible idea that causes a rain of deadly blubber.

But Lisa is still down.  Then she sees two baby whales swimming near the shore surrounded by hungry sharks.  Can Lisa get them to safety?  Homer shows up with a boat and a speargun to help, but some environmentalists are also there to protect the sharks.  Lisa actually agrees and gets Homer to put the speargun aside.  Too bad the action of that causes a sea gull to explode when a spear goes through it.  Then Homer finds the best way to save the baby whales by, er, falling into the ocean and attracting the sharks who think he’s a baby whale.  Well, at least his diet is working.  Granted, the environmentalists tossing him a bucket to bop sharks on the nose with may or may not work, but the bleeding head wound Homer suffers certainly makes things worse.

Fortunately, Bluella’s large male mate shows up to save the calves and Homer.  So, happy ending I guess?

Maybe if Homer is right and the papa whale settles down with a sexy lady octopus.

Say, how did Lisa know Bluella was a female?

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