Bento Review: Jurassic Strike Force 5

The back of this trade states quite clearly it is an all-ages book.

That’s a good warning for adults like me.  It may be fine for kids, but didn’t do much for me.

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I read this one pretty quickly.  It reminded me of a licensed book for some old 80s toy line that never existed.  Kids who don’t ask too many questions might dig this.  I do ask questions, so I did not.

The story unfolds as an alien conqueror comes to Earth about 150 million years ago and makes some soldiers for himself by quick-evolving some dinosaurs.  About half the group would fight him as the Strike Force (later redubbed Jurassic Strike Force 5), and the ones loyal to the villain were the Reptilians.  They have codenames and weapons and such that might make some nice toys.   Bare bones character traits are dispensed, moreso for the evil Reptilians than the benevolent Strike Force.  And hey, females from both teams have boobs so you can tell which ones are the females.

Reptiles with mammary glands, folks.  Let that sink in for a moment.

Also, once revived after a few hundred million year sleep, evil overlord guy goes straight to an American sub base in Antarctica where apparently there are some nuclear weapons.  I had no idea we had such things there.  Naturally, the Reptilians are more or less unstoppable against conventional human weapons, but whatever the Strike Force has works mostly if they didn’t just keep knocking each other out.

Say, why did the one Strike Force guy know that in boxing, a ten count means a knockout?  Or why did another have a weapon called a “rhino gun”?  I’m pretty sure there weren’t any rhinos or boxing in the jurassic period.

Heck, basic knowledge of geography makes the Antarctic base make no sense since it is on the ocean but somehow 100 miles south of the dig site where all these dinosaurs were found.

And did you know you can convert a robot bug to your side by simply using the word “friend”?  Apparently, bad guys don’t know that word because they never use it to get the bug back on their side.

See?  I ask questions.  Poor pacing, inconsistent artwork, less than by-the-numbers storytelling…this just wasn’t very good.  Heck, the entire creative team changed between issues one and two.  And I don’t mean just the writer and the artist.  The letterer and the colorist changed too.

Two out of ten disappearing spinosauri.

NEXT BOOK:  Well, the last book for the month is a rather thick web comic edition titled Sam & Fuzzy.  Can’t be any worse than this one.

tomk74

Defender of the faith, contributing writer, debonair man-about-town.

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