Simpsons Did It!: “Home Sweet Homediddly-Dum-Doodily”

Who in their right mind would believe Marge Simpson is a horrible parent?

Well, the county would under the right circumstances.

Those circumstances include Homer taking her away for a free spa getaway one morning, the dishes not being done, trash not taken out, Lisa having a ton of really old newspapers for a history project, Lisa losing her shoes and biting her tongue, and Bart getting head lice from a monkey.  Though Milhouse got what looks like malaria, so Bart got off lucky.  Meanwhile, disheveled Grampa was left alone with Maggie who took to drinking from the dog’s bowl while a “I’m a stupid baby” sign was taped to her back.  Stupid babies need the most attention, so the county takes the kids away from Marge and Homer.

And the foster home was the Flanders’ house.

Unable to talk to their kids, Marge and Homer try everything.  And by “everything,” I mean trying to call them only for a robocall to intercept (robocall voiced by Joan Kenley, AKA the original voicemail woman), and then taking a court-ordered class on how to raise children.  Homer and Marge look to be the only parents in there that aren’t cartoon rednecks.  I mean, Cletus is right there.  So is Agnes Skinner, clearly having not settled the dispute from when Marge was a cop over a bath pillow she shares with her adult son Seymour.

Meanwhile at the Flanders house, Bart and Lisa are not coping well.  The Flanders family is kinda lame.  When Bart finally gets Ned’s permission to watch Itchy and Scratchy, it mostly leaves Rod and Todd traumatized.  And the two Simpson children are absolutely worthless at Bible trivia.  Yes, even Lisa.  Maggie, meanwhile, is starting to fit right in.

Naturally, Homer and Marge pass the test, and are further horrified to see that Ned has taken it upon himself to baptize the Simpson kids.  That would mean in the eyes of God the Simpson children would forever be Flanderses.

That cannot stand.

Homer will do anything for his children.  Even take a baptismal for Bart, an act that makes him a bit devout for about ten seconds.

And fortunately, Maggie remembers Marge.

The Simpsons reunite, and Ned doesn’t put up a fight.  There will be no baptisms today.

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